Learning to harness our emotions will allow us to grow. Lisa Mosbey, host of Living with FAVOR, shares her secret on how to overcome challenges in life and rise like a phoenix. Build your dream with Lisa today.
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Walk In Triumph: Rise Like A Phoenix With Lisa Mosbey
A good and beautiful day, you beautiful souls. This is Charla Anderson, host of The Charla Anderson Show, Collector and Connector of Fascinating People, and Everyone is Fascinating, especially YOU! I’m so grateful for you to join me. We’re on a fabulous WinWinWomen platform. I have an incredible guest, Lisa Mosbey, an entrepreneur’s entrepreneur, a multi-entrepreneur, so to speak. We’re going to introduce her in a moment.
First, I’m going to do a mini vacation for us all. A little 22-second breathing exercise to get us centered and grounded. Breathe in calm for 7 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, and breathe out gratitude for 11 seconds. It helps me. I hope it helps you. It should. Let’s do it. Here we go. Breathing in calm for 7 seconds, hold, breathe out, release gratitude. Thank you. To me, the way our world is right now, it takes a few seconds to hit a little bit more centered, grounded, and connected. How’s that? Maybe more connected. We don’t always have time to hug trees, so that’s an option.
I’m excited and grateful to have Lisa Mosbey with me. She is a television show host on WinWinWomen as well. Her show is Living with FAVOR, which is an acronym. I know we’re going to go over that because I love her message. She is so multifaceted. I don’t know how much more she could have gotten done in her life that she’s done already, and she’s still out there doing it. There are a lot of us in this last half of our lives or less who are out there pumping it out. Lisa, thank you so much for being with me. I’m so happy to have you as my guest. Your FAVOR acronym is fabulous. Tell us a lot about who you are in this world and a little bit about what you do. We’ll roll with that.
I would love to do that. Thank you so much for welcoming me and bringing me in as a guest. Usually, I’m on your side of the table. When you told me of the topic of overcoming, I had to skip a beat and go, “I don’t know because I don’t put that out there in this format.” This is a new experience for me. I always love and embrace new experiences. I started as an entrepreneur 40 years ago. I’m celebrating September 12 this year will be 40 years in business. The majority of them is as an entrepreneur, at least in mindset. There have been a few times along the way when I needed to work for somebody else for short periods of time.
I have always owned my own business since I was eighteen years old. As an entrepreneur, all of those years, I've ridden the waves. I've gone up. I've gone down. I've had success. The greatest growth I had was in those failures. When you asked me about overcoming, I went back and looked at some of my journals and grabbed a couple of highlights over that time that maybe we'll talk about. I have some notes. Usually, I don't bring notes for an interview, but I did bring notes because I wanted to make sure that I hit some of those big monumental overcoming opportunities. That's what I hope to share. I'm also a holistic practitioner. I went and had two Master Herbalist Certifications. I retired from doing one-on-one work.
Now, I primarily live in the virtual world. I do accountability groups. I have a weight and wellness every Saturday morning for the last four years. I do two tech workshops a week where I work with folks to get their voice put into a digital format by creating landing pages, connecting them with email campaigns, and doing all of the digital marketing primarily for people in the wellness and service businesses. I do public speaking on top of that. My message in public speaking is this idea of Living With FAVOR.
You’re right. FAVOR is an acronym. It stands for Faith, Abundance, Vitality, Overflow, and Relationships. Those are the five pillars that stood out. They were a focus for me. I didn’t realize that. This is hindsight learning this as I was looking like, “What do I want to do in the next chapter?” Those are the five pillars that popped out. I played with a lot of different words. I was looking for an acronym of all those different words over the last four years, things that represented those 40 years. This is what I came up with. That’s the message. That’s what I’m talking about, podcasting about, and writing about. I don’t know what writing about is going to look like yet, but we’ll see.
Every time I saw Zig Ziglar and every time everybody saw him, he would say, “Have you written your book yet?” He died in 2012. It’s been a while, but every one of us has a story. We have stories. This is my ultimate goal with the overcoming. I’m talking about that with people. If we learn to share our stories, it offers hope because nobody has had a life like continual perfect growth and all that. You talked about some downtimes on your side at that time. Later on, we’re going, “I learned a lot,” but in the moment, not so much.
It was a struggle during those times in the moment.
You figured it out. We punch through and find a way. One way or the other, I don’t care what your circumstances are you’ve been provided for up until this moment in time if you can take a breath. It’s only when you don’t have another breath to take that it stops. We can recognize that this moment is all we have and those experiences have brought us to this moment in time.
I wouldn’t be where I am now and I wouldn’t serve tens of thousands of people that I have served had those points in my life not happened. I’d be on a totally different path, trajectory, or place.
Don't you love it? All of a sudden, you're going, "What happened? How did I get here?" It's like, "Wow." Do you notice that when you're open to receiving and learning, and are an avid learner, you're like a sponge? It's like me. I want to know everything, and then it gets a little scrambled in my brain. I'm trying to get it back out. Don't you notice that?
I do. For me, what contributed to that was blessing and releasing television. Four years ago, I said, “I don’t want to own a TV anymore.” I started with Libby, which is an app where you can check out books from the library, and I set a goal of doing two books a month. I started listening to that, doing audio, and taking courses online. I’m starting to fill up my brain with all those things that I wanted to do and say before I die. It changed things. I’ve always had an attitude of gratitude, but stepping in even stronger to that attitude of gratitude and giving back. It’s that extra piece of how you give back.
People keep saying, “You’re such a healer.” I’m like, “I don’t know about that, but I’m definitely the Lord’s cheerleader. If you get a struggle, I’m going to be on your side with the pompoms. I’m going to get you out of the mud. I’m going to pull you out. I’m the tow truck. I’m the cheerleader.” I help, serve, and aim to motivate people. As my sister says, “Pull up your big girl pants. Grab your coffee cup and you’re ready for the day.” She used to send me these little icons when I was going through the tough stuff in 2017 and 2018. That one stuck with me because I love coffee. She’s like, “Get out of bed. Pull up your big girl pants. Grab the coffee cup and hit the floor running.” You put these things in place to get you motivated and keep you going.
The first thing in giving up television is there’s no arrogance in this. Between seventh and eighth grade, I got addicted to three soap operas, General Hospital, Dark Shadows, and whatever else the other. I don’t remember. I did not think I could go back to school. I didn’t think I could go to eighth grade. I was so distraught to miss my shows. During that time of my life, I was like, “I am not going to be addicted to anything.” After the summer of eighth grade when I had the opportunity to get back into those hope operas, I was like, “I’m not going to be addicted to anything. I’m not doing it.” Looking back decades and decades later and going, “I gave up television basically between seventh and eighth grade.” I don’t think I am less of a person because of it. I think that I have gained so much.
You mentioned the library. I take my little nineteen months old grandbaby, and we go to the library. She would get eight books every week. She gets them on the end of her bed and will read them in the mornings. They’re hard books right now. I want the love of learning and reading to replace that. There’s nothing you can’t learn in the library. Seriously, all wisdom and knowledge is there. People’s legacies are there. I appreciate that.
If I’m not mistaken, I’m sure there are newer studies, but Jim Rohn said 3% of people have library cards. If you’re single, our libraries have all kinds of events. I don't want to go to a singles group because it's like a meat market. They have so many events. They have craft making, 3D printing, and all kinds of crazy stuff. That is a good place to spend time. They have free internet and all that. You mentioned 2 or 3 things that got my attention. We’re learning. Good for you.
It’s not that it’s disconnected. I had to let go of that. I still have my iPad, so I stream stuff. I still get my news feeds. I went to the movies. I go pretty consistently on Tuesday. I still have that form of entertainment. What I realized for me is that I don’t want to watch someone living a life. I want to live the life that I’m watching on TV. I think I’m at 23 countries and 38 states right now. That’s just the beginning. I want to keep going. I have a friend. I had dinner with her on Friday night. She and her husband sold everything they owned. It was twelve years ago. They left Minnesota and had been traveling the world hundreds of thousands of miles.
They reached their millionth follower on their website because she has been writing every single day of this journey for the last twelve years about their experiences of being vagabonds, living on the road, and not owning a car or a house. They own what they can fit into the 4 to 5 suitcases that they carry with them. They have nothing in storage. None of their kids hold any of their possessions. Everything they own is in their mind, heart, and five suitcases. I said, “When I grow up, I aspire to be that.”
What an incredible story. My big question is always like, “They still have to have a mailbox.” I’ve got a permanent UPS or some UPS mailing address, and I’m sure they can manage that. It seems like you’d still have to have something. What an adventure. I would love to meet them. I want to spend a day with a week with them. How do two people have that mindset?
I still hope that my partner has that mindset or somebody who can fill in my gaps. I’m the type of person who would jump in the deep end and go, “Crap, I can’t swim.” I do take risks. Some people call me a risk-taker. I didn’t think I was, but some people say that I am. I’d like to find that person that fills my gap again. I had one once, and I need one again to fill my gap. I don’t need one, but if I were to look for a partner, it’s like, “Fill my gaps.” I want to have somebody who shares that same desire for adventure and travel, and impacting the lives of others through our experiences.
That’s the key. My mama said, “Make the world a better place. Leave things better than you found them.” It’s not that hard to do. Let your light shine, be kind, and offer a candy bar and a hug to the checkout clerks or something. The harder people are to love, the more they need it. Love them anyway. I have unconditional love and forgiveness but not unconditional boundaries. I’m not talking about that.
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I’m talking about release attachment to that. You’ve got to be right. Release it and know that the love is God’s love. If He’s love, He can’t be not love. Those are some of my sayings I continue to repeat almost every week or two. That always comes out because I feel like it’s critically important for humanity that we begin caring more for each other. You said something about your genius. People call you, “Your genius is what?” Listening, hearing, and solutions.
It’s simplifying. I can take a concept and keep it simple. A lot of times, we make mountains out of molehills. It doesn’t matter what it was that happened or how big it is in the moment. Coming from scripture, “Everything is working for our good. Beauty comes from ashes. The sun will rise in the morning for many of us. Some of us go on to be with our maker.” If we know that things are working for our good and beauty will come from ashes, and every tear shed is counted, we can find hope, courage, and bravery in the moment when we’re walking through these trials. That’s where sometimes we lose sight.
When it’s darkest before dawn, we become desperate. We panic and get into anxiety when truly what the Lord is asking us is to be still. Psalm 48:10, “Be still and know that I’m God.” Know that everything is provided because He’s our provider and protector. When we are in that place of needing to overcome and when the challenges are greater than ours, we need to lean on Him. We need to ask for what would serve us and then be quiet and listen. Asking and praying to God is us speaking when we’re in meditation and open to receiving and allowing it to come in. That’s when He’s going to talk to us. He won’t talk over us. We have to be still and allow the answers and the solutions to come to us.
My genius is to strip it away. Those are a lot of different biblical principles. They’re all big ones if you want to dive deeper into it. When I string some of those together, it makes it a little bit simple. I do that with technology as well. I represent a platform that we’ve reduced to the ridiculous. It is what I call it. We’ve made it so easy for people to use technology now to get their message out, be an entrepreneur, serve their families, and create a residual income for themselves.
I try to make things easy for people in life and business and reduce the struggles to help them have an impact and move forward, not get stuck. Because a lot of people that I meet are in a place of stuckness. They might be stuck, and they don’t know how to move out. I can break that chain pretty fast with most people, get them free and free to move on and do great things again.
I think you are so onto the secret. The secret is, as we already mentioned, cutting out some of the technology of constantness like our phones. Many people don't ever have quiet. It's like, "I'm keeping it on for the noise in the background." I'm like, "It's noise. Sit in silence and peace. You cannot receive the spirit." We're not talking religion even a bit here. We're talking about relationships, spirit, and your own inner soul that can speak to you and tell you things. In witnessing what's going on around us, a few people take 5 minutes to take a deep breath and take 22 seconds to breathe as a little exercise.
It is frenetic. It seems our world is frenetic right now. I said being still is key, but gratitude is the key. I know you said that too. I believe gratitude is the ultimate key to opening up a life of happiness, joy, and contentment. If you can't live in gratitude and give thanks for everything, you might have heard that, we’re onto something here that some people could glean huge peace. I don’t see people living in contentment and peace. It’s like, “What’s next? What can I be entertained by?” Is that right?
Yeah. Gratitude is expanding. Gratitude opens up. Negative thoughts, anxiety, panic, and lower energy and emotions are constricting. They don’t make space for us to see opportunity when we’re in that state. Those aren’t my words. That’s science. You can follow Dr. Bruce Lipton to learn more about that. Also, Joe Dispenza and Greg Braden. They’re scientists. We have some medical doctors in there who’ve studied the brain and showed positive words versus negative words while people are hooked up to the electrodes on their brains. They’re studying what parts of the brain light up. We know that negativity, negative words, and negative states of mind lower our immune system, and can cause disease in the body.
Gratitude is the key. How do you manage your mindset? One of the masterminds that I facilitate is about mindset, health and weight management, your technology, and your business. Those are my 1, 2, 3. Those are the three areas that I found that I needed help and that I needed to focus on. Now I bring amazing people together to support each other in those three areas.
My second book coming out in 2023 is called Split Second Transformation, Change Your Words, Change Your Life, 31 Daily Practices. I listen to people speak death over themselves or speak what they don’t want. I want to shake them and go, “Speak what you want, not what you don’t want. Speak life, not death. Speak health, not disease.”
We're not taught that. I believe our media has not been very favorable to keeping us on the higher side of life, higher vibration, or better energy of life. I also read You Are The Placebo by Dr. Joe Dispenza. It is an amazing study and book. His story of overcoming is crazy. I know a lot of people like that.
The complaining, they’ve proven it. If you complain, it makes a rut almost in your brain. It gets deeper and deeper. It’s not hard. It’s simple, but it takes work to stop and get out of that. Upset draws upset. Love draws love. This is what I tell my grandkids. “Nobody can hurt your feelings without your permission. Nobody can make you angry without your permission.” Stop and think, “Am I allowing everybody else to control my emotions?” A lot of us are.
They can hurt us physically. Somebody could cut you, punch you, and hurt you. How we respond to emotional hurts is from the inside, not the outside.
Mindset is a huge piece of mine. I have a friend who wrote a book called Mind Shift on Demand, Donna Blevins. When you surround yourself with people that will nudge or kick you if you need, they nudge you to take that higher road. My mama said, “Take the high road.” I added, “If it’s hard, take the high road.” We have a choice, and everything is a choice. I don’t think people think that. They think that things are happening to them. No. You always have a choice.
You can have a choice as to how you respond.
You’re doing some weekly mentoring and coaching. Tell me a little bit about that. How are people going to find you if they want to? We’ll do this again at the end, but you’re gifted. You’re out there and making an impact. How can people tap into that with you?
I try to do everything through membership programs where we come together as a group. I can lecture to people all day long, and I do that. I step into that space with a keynote or try to express something. For me, I find that I have the greatest impact when I facilitate a group environment with different perspectives and people. That's why I love doing the show host, where I get to interview folks, and then people who join the show can stick around and have that conversation afterward where they can get instant answers. Take away a solution in that moment. How we launch and get people out of their stuckness. It needs to happen in the now. If it's going to drag out and take too long, people won't take action.
When I can hear input from different people, I can formulate ideas and give people simple action steps that oftentimes can shift them. They can shift them from being stuck. I love this idea. I believe it was the book Atomic Habits, and they talk about micro habits. If somebody wants to go out and run a marathon, they don’t go from the couch to the starting line. There’s a process that happens in between there. One of the steps in that process would be to get up in the morning and put on your tennis shoes. If you want to run a marathon, every morning, get up and put on your tennis shoes. One of the days that you put on your tennis shoes, you’ll decide to go for a walk. You may only go to the mailbox and back, but one of those days, you’ll start to go for the walk by putting on the tennis shoes.
You don’t even have to think any further than that. You hold the intention in your heart. You have the thought of running the marathon, and you start by putting on your shoes. Action will beget action. By putting on tennis shoes and then maybe putting on the outfit or the uniform for the day, whether it’s running shorts or a tank top and shorts. You are going to put them on and wear them and maybe got to get ready for work, but you don’t take any action. If you get in the behavior of doing that micro action every day, the shoes, then maybe we add the clothes, a walk to the local park, or a walk to get coffee.
There’s one gentleman who was coming to my workshop on Saturday mornings, and he had a knee replacement. He said, “I need to get activity. They want me to run or go to the gym.” He decided he was going to walk to get his coffee every morning. He walks to the local grocery store, where they do have a coffee shop. Now he has this whole clan of people that see him every morning. They expect him to show up. When he is not, they check in with him.
He’s been walking for years now. It’s been a couple of years that he walks Monday through Friday to go get his coffee. It costs him a couple of cents to do it, maybe $1 or something. He visits with those folks and he walks home. He’s getting his steps in. He found a way of doing it. It’s meditative. He does prayer during that time. He listens to books on tape at that time. He is feeding his brain, and he’s fixing his body. It was one step at a time. It was a small habit that allowed him to create that space in his life to become healthy again.
I find that no matter what people need to do or how they need to move that needle for themselves, there are micro habits that we can start to do to move you in the direction of the goal or the optimum outcome that we're looking for. I think that's where I start with most folks. I try to reduce it down to the ridiculous, make it as simple as possible, and then start to stack those micro habits and create momentum in people's lives. Before you know it, they've reached their goal with ease and comfort.
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We do that through these mastermind groups where people come. They talk about what their challenges are and get feedback from other people. It’s not just from me. I give a lot of feedback and advice. The idea is that we learn better together in community. We create accountability when we speak out about what it is that we desire and what our optimum outcome is.
Now, you have cheerleaders. You have people in this room who care for you, who want you to succeed, and they’re not going to bring you down. They’re going to edify you, lift you up, encourage you, and they’re not going to let you get stuck. For adult learning, I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than that. It fills me my cup and I don’t ever think I can retire. I had to release that word for my vocabulary because I get to hold the space for people to have these beautiful life experiences. I want to do more and more of them.
How do we find you? How does that happen?
LisaMosbey.com. You can go to my website. It’s just me.
Tom Ziglar is a friend of mine. He is the proud son of Zig Ziglar. He has created a saying of his own. That is, "The fastest way to success is to exchange bad habits for good habits." I'm not sure that's exactly the quote, but it's similar to that. When we choose to make one little shift in a different direction and make one positive change. Don't beat ourselves up to death if we mess up. It’s just a mistake. You can start over again or go back, apologize for that moment, move forward, and do it again. By the way, are you familiar with Michael Singer? He wrote The Untethered Soul. I don’t know how I missed him for all these years, but in this year, I fell in love with him. He is an old hippie that decided to meditate and became a very successful CEO. He’s still living in his woods.
I did the Audiobook, and then I bought it. In some books, I had to see it, feel it, and highlight it. One of the things is remembering authors. Thank you for bringing that back.
The Surrender Experiment was the first one I read because it’s his life story and you can relate, Untethered Soul, and then the one I’ve got right here, but I haven’t read it yet is The Living Untethered. That’s the third one of his. One of the things that I love that he says is when we’re managing habits, bad habits, smoking, drinking, or whatever we do, we have a twinge that we probably shouldn’t do as much. He calls it managing urges. I think that’s so simple because I will go, “I have the urge to do something I probably shouldn’t do. It would be best if I minimize it,” or whatever.
If it's an urge that I can manage in this second, then maybe I can manage it in the next second. I can start recognizing it as I just want to drink, and getting up and doing it and going, "That's an urge. If I wait five minutes, that'll pass. As soon as I get this done, then I can do it." Managing urges is a huge piece of what he says. If somebody cuts you off, you're mad or whatever. He says, "Take a second, relax, release it, let it go, and do what’s necessary.” You’ve got to take action, but relax the emotion behind it and release that because if it’s already happened, nothing you can change from the last breath to the last century. You cannot change one second that way.
I love that. When something is going on, I’m like, “Is this going to matter?” We’re a tiny spec of dirt in the vast trillions of years of humanity, the universe, and all this stuff that we’re spending on this planet. In this one spec of time, we’re going to let that driver that cut you off upset you? Because we’re in a society right now where you offended me, I’m triggered, and all this stuff. I’m like, “You’re choosing all that.” We don’t have to be triggered and offended by anything. What do you think?
I’m all over that. We have to manage our emotions. We have this body and we’re in charge of it. We’re also in charge of our brains, our feelings, and all of our senses. The emotions that we experience are ours. If somebody cuts me off, my coin of phrase on that is I’ll say, “I bless and release you. I hope you get where you need to go safely. I’m sorry if somebody in your life is hurt.” If they need to get there faster than me, I can create space for them.
If you’re familiar with Matt Kahn, he said, “A master is one who blesses.” I said, “That makes me a master because may you be blessed.” Now I’m like, “May that situation be blessed and well taken care of, and those all trapped behind them too.” If there’s a wreck or something, I’m like, “Bless those in it and those behind it.” If you can bless instead of that, “Ugh.” I heard somebody go, “I bet they have to go to the bathroom really bad.”
That works too. When you get angry, you give away your power. You allow somebody to take you from a higher vibration to a lower state of mind. Do you want to give up a stranger who cut you off in the car your power? Do you want to give up that energy? Do you want to lower your immune system for that person? I don't. I choose to live at as higher vibration as possible. Now 9:00 AM for me is different than 9:00 PM. My vibration may not be the same in both of those times, though I do have extremely high energy. I do get up very early. My best at 9:00 AM is different than my best at 9:00 PM. They're both my best. They're the best that I can do at that time.
We get to manage our energy and emotions. We need to find peace in feeling the feels, but not giving away the power. It’s like, “Yes, I’m angry. What am I going to do about it?” I can choose to use a cuss word or bless and release that feeling. It’s like, “You’re not going to get there safely if you’re headed to take care of somebody else. I bless you and hope this all works out for you.” That allows me to evaporate the emotion. The intense emotion I was feeling came up and I got to let it out, but I maintained my high vibration.
You mentioned talking about words. You wrote a book on it. One of my keynotes is about conscious language. Would you let somebody come into your house with their garbage and dump it on your living room floor? If you said no to that, then why would you let somebody dump their garbage into your brain? Once it goes in, that computer that runs our body cannot delete it. It gets stuck in there. If somebody is speaking negatively to you or you’re listening to all the horror of the world and not putting the positive in there, you’re going to get stuck in a lower vibration in a place in your life that maybe you don’t want to be.
How do we fill up for good? How do we invite people to come alongside us in our lives that are uplifting and positive? Not to say that we don’t have bad experiences. I came prepared to talk about some of the trauma that I went through for over ten years, from 2008 to 2018. Some of those things that I needed to overcome during that period which has brought me to the person that I am now and how I managed all of those emotions. I think we’ll save it for another time.
I would love a little bit of that because that’s what we were initially going to talk about, the overcoming thing in life. It flows whatever it goes. I would take one. I’ll take something. If you’re talking about ten years period, what we speak now, was that who we were? No. We learned along the way. I’ve always been optimistic, but I was bitter for a lot of years. I found split second transformation. You can’t change your words and change your life in one split second. It takes practice. Share that, just a smidge.
I don’t know that it’s a smidge. It’s more than a smidge. If you pull something out of it, you lose context. Here’s what I will share. I was with my husband for 29 years and then I became single again after 29 years. I’m not going to get into the details of that stuff. Going forward from that point, we completed our marriage in December 2017. I lived in Las Vegas, Nevada for fifteen years but I had never gone to the Strip for fireworks. I had moved away. I was in Wisconsin at this point. I went back. I hopped on a plane and said, “I’m going back for New Year’s because I love fireworks.” I got married on the 4th of July. I met my husband at the Minnesota State Fair.
There were fireworks every night for twelve days. Fireworks were a huge deal in my life. I needed a reset. I needed to reset the emotions, feelings, and everything that was tied to fireworks. I went to Las Vegas and went down on the Strip of Las Vegas. I didn’t invite any of my local friends or anything. I was staying with someone. Everyone was very fearful at this point. In 2017, they had machine guns. The National Guard was there. There was a lot of concern about things happening on the Strip. It was like, “That’s okay. If it’s my time, God has got me. He’s my provider and protector. I need a reset. I need to get me back. I need to pull back in my mindset empowerment. I needed empowerment. I needed to go alone.”
I stood there and watched the fireworks. I'm amongst a couple million of my closest friends at that point. It was a time of reflection. From 2018 to current, I've had some takeaways that I've learned. One is you need to acknowledge the problem. We need to be aware of the struggles, challenges, and what's going on. Put words to it. Don't hold it in ourselves and our bodies. Journal the heck out of it. Get it out of your system and body and recognize the problem.
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Start to understand it. Where was the breakdown in it? You don’t have to do this step. Sometimes just getting it out is enough. You can bless and release it. For me, I needed to get an understanding and maybe reflect inward and say, "How was I at fault? What could I have done better?" Not to bring myself down but to give myself an opportunity to grow and learn from that. What was rising like the Phoenix going to look like? Number three is like, “How am I going to rise like a Phoenix out of this? How am I going to set some goals and discover some optimum outcomes? What are the dreams and desires that I hadn’t lived over those 29 years that I wanted to step into and experience?”
Come up with a plan. They didn’t all happen that night, but that night was a reset. It was a starting point of it. As I’m able to reflect back since the end of 2017 through 2017 and then 2018 with that fresh start, these are some of the takeaways. I wrote them down. There are ten takeaways for me over that span. Number four was to devise a plan. Come up with a plan. It’s not going to be perfect the first time, but start planning for the future. Don’t get stuck in the past because we can live in the past, but the past has already happened. The only gift that we have is the present.
If you can look to the future, you can experience the presence with more gratitude and joy. Creating that plan and then seeking support. Over the last years, the amazing people that I’ve met that God has placed in my life and that I have attracted and been open to receiving helped me through grief, pain, loss, sorrow, and all those emotions that were sucking the life out of me. You need to get into support. I don’t want people to listen to those people that have all the answers but they’re not uplifting. People have been through this walk before me, and there will be people following me that will go through this walk. I wanted to be with those people that came out on the other side with joy, happiness, and a newfound relationship.
Taking action, number six, is moving through the trauma and the trial, and having a plan to do that. Taking action to be able to do that and then living in the present, which is number eight. Staying present with your feelings and emotions. Number nine is practicing self-care. For me, self-care is I don’t miss church. I love going to praise. I sit in the front row. I seldom go with anybody else. You all are always welcome. There’s never anybody sitting in the front row with me. I sit in front of the speaker and sing at the top of my lungs. That releases all the negative energy of the week, and then I get to start over again. That’s my form of self-care for other people. I love hot baths and maybe cups of coffee. I love sunrises and sunsets and putting my feet in the sand.
What are those physical things for you that cause a joyful emotion in your body? Again, it stops you from getting stuck. The last one, my tenth tip out of those reflections, is to reflect and learn. Growth comes through trials. If everything was always coming up roses, we wouldn’t become better people. We have to walk through the trial. We don’t have to stay stuck in it. Reflect and learn and be able to find those people to come alongside you to move you through it.
Growth comes through trials. If everything always comes up with roses, we wouldn't become better people. Click To Tweet
I am so glad that we went back there because I’m so optimistic. I call it outrageously optimistic. I just don't see the bad very often. I'm not naive. It's not naivety. It's strictly a choice to not dwell on the negative. All of those things and that little story of your transformation there, people will say, "You're not living in reality but that's the way I feel." I feel like showing that perspective that none of us had it easy or smooth sailing. I would say almost nobody probably has had a life that didn't have some ripples in it somewhere, at least. I know people that are realists, “I’m a realist, so I know what’s going on. I need to know what’s going on in the world.” I was like, “Whose perspective are you hearing it from?”
I think that you brought us back to we find there are tools. There are people and availabilities to overcome the harshness. We’ve all had it. Those ten tips that you came up with, I’m sure not that night but along the path. You picked something. You chose something. You go, “I need something different. I need to have some closure on that. I need to have some renewal of my spirit.” I love that you did that.
That was one of a few trips. I ended up in Boston because that’s where I went for spring break when I was in high school. I went to New York with my sister because she always wanted to go there. I can rattle off a bunch of them. I had to go travel. I had to go expand and be grateful for the world we live in so that I could get out of the stuckness that was happening in my life. If you do one thing now, take a look at where you’re stuck and what’s one action step that you can do to get unstuck, expand what you’re looking at, and see another option.
Probably we’re speaking to the crowd or the people that already do most of this. People that need it the most may not be looking for it. That’s the sad thing in a lot of ways. I don’t want to make generalizations that much, but the younger people that I know and live with and are around often are just looking to be entertained. They don’t necessarily have the self-inspection to go, “How can I make this different? How can I shift?” They’re reactionary rather than pro-actionary in their lives. Do you see that too?
I was that when people looked at my life as a fairytale life. It was pretty darn extraordinary. There was a lot of pain at the end, but I didn’t know that I would undo anything that I did. I was so incredibly blessed with a successful company. In my early twenties, that was bought out by a Fortune 500 company. It led to travel opportunities, beautiful homes, cars, and all the stuff. That all went away. I was stripped down to having nothing when I was 50 years old. In fact, I filed a tax return when I was 18, 19, and 20. I didn’t have a lot of money. At 50, after having 29 years of my husband filing a tax return, I find myself going, “I don’t know how to do this stuff.”
He had a role and I had a role, and we stayed in our own lanes. There was this whole world of things that I had to learn, start over with, and find a place to live and a job to have because I lost my business partner and my love partner. I lost my home, business, income, resources, and a good percentage of my friends, or most of them. I was being stripped down to nothing. I'm feeling naked in the world and being born again. I don't mean that in a spiritual sense. I mean that like renewal. There’s a lot of fear in that, and a lot of people would be fearful of that. I’m not saying I didn’t have fear. I had fear, elation, joy, and curiosity for what was coming next because I knew God had a plan.
It was a clean slate. Now what do I want to do when I grow up? Now what do I want to be? I can create my life. Everything is created through our words. It’s through our words and our commitment to surviving sometimes. Sometimes it’s surviving for the next moment and building on that to where we become thrivers, and then we can help other people do it, which is what you’re doing. I didn’t know that part about your story.
I see this amazing overcomer doing all these things and having success everywhere you look. I’m inspired. That’s what I want people to hear when they tune in to my show and I’m sure your show. We want people to be inspired to be their best because when I’m speaking and being my best, it allows you permission or an example to be like, “I could step it up a little bit too.” The old Marianne Williamson’s Course in Miracle allows other people permission.
I have the Teacher’s Guide and the Student Guide. I have the workbook. It’s all on there. I don’t buy a lot of books, but that one is on there too.
We’ve got Four Agreements.
It’s on there.
That’s great. That particular book is the one I’ve recommended most over the years until when I was coming from the fundamental Christian world. That was recommended to me. I was like, “It’s in the new age section. I better not do it.” I’m so grateful that I did and that I opened my heart to know that God doesn’t have a little box. Each little religion being their own little thing or each little yogi being their own little thing. God doesn’t have a box. It’s about loving and relationships.
Also, giving a relationship with him. Let everything else drop down. It’s like, “Get in a relationship.” You’ll find peace in your heart, and love and gratitude if you can do that.
Gratitude is the key and in everything, give thanks. It doesn't mean you have to like it. You don’t have to love your circumstances. You don’t have to like that where you are right the second, but it’s the only place you have to take the next step from. If you don’t like where you are right this second, where else do you have to start? This is it. Make a new choice. Make a different decision if you need to. Take this moment, this moment, and this moment because you can’t undo that. They’re already gone. Love yourself enough to take one decision. What do you call it? The first little step that’s a micro?
Micro habits. Start to create those micro habits for yourself. Don’t miss those. I do 12 before 12 every day. I never lose a day because I have 12 activities that I do. I do a little bible study, reading, and fitness. I have 12 habits that I do 12 before 12 every day. I never lose a day. I have ten great nieces and nephews over the next development. If they show up and want to be in my life for that day, I’m there for them. My mom and dad are with me. If they need help, I’m there for them. I have created a lifestyle that allows me to still win the day for me, my business, and the people that I serve, and be there for those that I love, adore, and get to spend time with.
Sometimes, hearing somebody else speaking that 12 before 12. That's something I can do. There are also some non-negotiables that I'm going to do every single day. You can put it whatever you want to, but they don't have to be big. I'm 69 years old this year. I’m like, “I’m going to meditate every day.” I know me. If I get up and do stuff, I’ll never go back to it. I’ve made it my way. Get up, go to the bathroom, and lay back down. It could be 5 minutes or 2 hours, but I’m going to commit that for me. It’s a habit. I found a way because I let everything else run my life a lot of times. I’m making a choice this year to make some different choices. That’s where we are. LisaMosbey.com?
Yes, ma’am. Correct.
The incredible depth of wisdom and the contribution that I see in you is very touching to me. I get truth bumps. I feel like you’re special. We’re all special, but you have chosen to step up on a stage of special. When we can touch more people, my little thing is to let my light shine when I go to the grocery store. I let people feel my love, presence, and energy. It’s interesting sometimes people glean towards you, but that’s our way. Every little bit helps. We’ve been here an hour now almost. This is crazy. I love our conversations. I love this time to commune with others that want to make a difference and leave the world a better place, as my mama said. LisaMosbey.com, and I’m sure you’re on Facebook as Lisa Mosbey.
Facebook, LinkedIn, Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, and all the things. They’re different things. Some were herbs, some for me, and some for health and wellness. If you get to my main page, it can take you to all the avenues however you want to engage with me.
I’m CharlaAnderson.com as well. We are finding our way, punching through, lifting each other up, and lifting you up as we go. Thank you for your time, Lisa, and for blessing me and blessing humanity with your beautiful presence. I always end with my saying. Who I am? My name means joy. I’m always saying I love you very much. Remember, choose joy.
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I’m Charla Anderson, host of The Charla Anderson Show, Collector & Connector of Fascinating People (and EVERYONE is Fascinating!) on live TV, streaming and podcasts. As a Ziglar Legacy Certified Trainer, a retired award-winning flight attendant, Olympic Torch bearer, personal development junkie, Inspired Speaker, Published Author and Your Courageous Coach, I want to share my passion of living life full-out, saying YES to intriguing opportunities, and encouraging YOU to do the same. Let’s jump on a discovery call and get to know each other. Find all things Charla at CharlaAnderson.com/Links.
On The Charla Anderson Show, We discuss Mindset, How much Your WORDS matter, Princess to Queen energy, mantras, HOPE, Faith, Miracles, Overcoming, and much, much more, including learning from amazing guests.
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About Lisa Mosbey
Lisa has been a sales & marketing entrepreneur for 40 years with experience in both technology & wellness.
She is a Holistic Living Expert & facilitates a wellness workshop every Saturday morning.
She is Your Guide to Digital Marketing Success! Entrepreneurs join her Accountability Community Calls where she advises, trains, & coach’s small business owners in mindset, business development, & digital marketing.
