Healing From Deep Heartbreaks With Veta Newton

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks

 

Veta Newton guides women in embracing both their imperfections and remarkable gifts. She shares the power of hope and healing through deep heartbreaks, empowering others to celebrate uniqueness and find strength in the face of pain.

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Healing From Deep Heartbreaks With Veta Newton

Beautiful souls, I’m so grateful to have you with us. I’m Charla Anderson, host of the Charla Anderson Show, Collector & Connector of Fascinating People (and EVERYONE is Fascinating, especially YOU!). We’re on this extraordinary Win Win Women platform. We’re live streaming on Roku, Apple TV, Amazon Fire, and Podetize. I’m so grateful for that. That will be forthcoming. I’ve been doing guests with overcomers, people who have gone through and overcome, and this episode is no exception.

I’m going to tell you more about Veda Newton in a moment but she’s an expert on what not to do in relationships. As you know, we always start with a beautiful 22-second mini-vacation, a meditation that gets us grounded and calm. I want you to join me first. In this little meditation, we’re going to breathe in calmly for 7 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, and breathe out gratitude for 11 seconds. Will you join me on this? Here we go.

We’re going to breathe in for seven seconds, hold, release it, and breathe out gratitude. Thank you. If we all did that a little bit more often in our daily run, we would probably be having a better day. Take a moment to relax and release. Sometimes in that still, quiet moment, you might hear miracle words. You never know but thank you for joining me with that.

I’m happy because I have a new friend, Veta Newton. We are both publishing books with Beyond Publishing. We’ve met with Michael Butler. We’re in a mastermind together. Veta has such an exuberant personality and a living life. She’s a little behind me in age. We’re decades into that life. I want to introduce what I said about her as an expert on what not to do in relationships.

Veta has got a lot of things going for her. She’s been a fitness expert for many years. With my grandbaby, we do Sonicare shuffle for two and a half minutes every morning while we’re brushing our teeth and that’s my exercise. I’m so impressed with you. Veta, let’s hear a little bit about who you are in this world and then we’ll get into what you do.

 

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks

 

Thank you, Charla, for having me on the show. It’s such an honor to even be a guest on this wonderful show. Charla has so many friends that are in the business so Charla has friends that can speak to overcoming obstacles. I appreciate you having me on the show. Thank you so much. My story is humble but I hope that it’ll help someone else. I have a colorful past, to say the least. Everyone has a story so you learn from your past mistakes. Instead of being embarrassed by them, I’ve learned to embrace those mistakes. That’s where my book started, trying to talk to people that are women, especially those who are maybe new to dating. That’s where I’m going with the book.

It’s renewed to dating. Most of us dated in high school but so many people end up in life situations that leave them hanging out there. They don’t know. I don’t know what they don’t know and trying to enter into that dating room. I’ve been single for a lot of years and have not entered the dating room. If something’s going to show up, it’s going to be very organic for me. I still need to figure out who I am.

My whole take on my life and my story is that we need to be where we are learning ourselves before trying to search for a relationship. Just because somebody says they like you or want to be with you, that doesn’t mean they have your best interest.

Just because somebody says they like you, or they want to be with you, doesn't mean they have your best interest. Click To Tweet

They might want somebody to do their laundry.

Yes. A nurse or a purse, as I put it.

I’ve got young girls in my daughter’s age and they’re in and out. I still wish I could get them to see that they need to be who they are without always having somebody around. It’s a huge message that even young teenagers can start realizing it’s fun to go out and have dates but if you don’t have that confidence to know who you are in this world and your values, you’re lost. Whose values are you going to have? You got to be set. I wasn’t and I guess you weren’t.

Not at all. I’ve struggled along in so many relationships and marriages. I don’t even want to speak it but I’ve learned what not to do and what to do. I wanted to embrace myself, my values, what I accept, and what I’m going to have limits. I did have a dating episode that started this whole process. I wasn’t ready to date. It hasn’t been that long. That is why I started this book because I made some bad mistakes. I learned from them and I wanted to share them. Before teaching people their purpose, learn their value and purpose first, which is hard to do. I don’t know if it’s maturity or what.

We’re not taught for certain. Society is not gearing us towards that. They want us to have all this and it’s not necessarily powerful for each of us individually. You wrote something about the heartbreak and the resilience after it, trying to empower and guide women toward finding love while staying true to themselves. That is a powerful objective, for sure.

Yes, staying true to yourself. If you can tap into yourself, which I never did before. I was out there willy-nilly doing whatever, like most people.

Reacting instead of planning.

In society, it’s different than it was when we were dating in our younger years. Not just the world but us in general. As we age, our priorities change. Being by yourself is not a bad thing. It’s a good thing. I’ve been learning that. I’m thinking, “Do I want someone else in my life to tell me maybe what to do and what not to do?”

The world is different compared to our younger years or when we were still dating. As we age, our priorities change. Click To Tweet

Asking permission.

I’m stepping back but I wanted others to know. Some of them may be ready to go out there.

You’ve got some resources and stuff along that line as well, it seems like. You had an unhealthy dating episode or something. Was it online?

I had been in a marriage for 30 years and when I got out of that, it was traumatizing, to say the least. People were saying, “Get out there and jump back in.” I did jump back in. Right out of the shoot, I got a person online and it went south fast, badly.

M good friend, Debbie Montgomery Johnson, will be a guest. She was in 1 year or 2 years relationship online after her husband died. She fell in love with someone and ultimately was scammed out of over $1 million. It was incredibly horrifically humiliating when he finally admitted it after that long of a time, which was amazing because they’re trained and it’s so sad.

Why don’t people do the right thing? Why don’t they take the high road? Why do they want to scam people when they know how to say the right things and do the right things? They might as well be the right person seems to me. To toss it out there, this is me. I can’t even imagine going online and trying to figure those things out. I’m rare on that. I don’t know. I’m not lonely enough to do that.

I talk in my book about how we grew up at our age was different than what it is now. It was not that dangerous growing up as a kid. We were able to go the streets and stay out late, not fear of anybody bad. To me, there wasn’t anybody bad back when I was growing up. Our parents let us go play. Now you can’t do that. There’s so much, I don’t want to say evil but I guess there is a lot of evil.

It’s more so now but there are more people now. I am so outrageously optimistic that our world is getting better. There are more good than bad. The tipping point is much more love. Love is out there but it seems like you hear more about the bad. We got much more awareness of it because of the internet and all that stuff too. I’m so optimistic also so I don’t see bad in people. They got to prove themselves to be wrong. I can help lift the energies that people aren’t going to mess with.

I’m the one that always gives the benefit of the doubt until I’m on the floor and somebody says, “Wake up. How stupid are you?” That’s what my friends were telling me. It’s not good. It is what it is. I’ve learned there is no benefit of the doubt. If you don’t see it straight away, you got to move on. You can’t even give the benefit of the doubt. That’s my opinion.

There is no benefit of the doubt if you don't see the mistake straight away. Click To Tweet

We don’t want to be all or nothing either because there are some great people out there.

If it sounds fishy, it usually is fishy. This guy, I talked to him for several months and he was in a business doing something else somewhere else. People are saying to me, “This is not right.” There are a lot of things I learned that I put in my book. The most important thing I want people to learn, especially women, is that you are perfectly perfect by yourself. Don’t look for someone else to make you perfect. You’re perfect the way you are. That’s the only thing.

That’s part of my message as well. We’re very similar in our messages. You wrote the importance of self-worth. It’s the foundation upon which all relationships are built. We got to learn to value ourselves, recognize our strengths, and celebrate the unique qualities that make us who we are. You have an example. I should have asked you to have one where you could have it in your hand, like the Japanese. What’s that word?

Kintsugi is the name of this Japanese art. That’s in my head. I woke up and God gave it to me. It’s like the Japanese repairing their pottery that is broken with gold. If it’s a pottery piece, anything that breaks in Japan, they repair it with gold. When your heart breaks, you get scars. That’s how I analyze that as being an analogy to repairing your heart.

God repairs your heart with gold. It makes you more valuable because you have more scars. You’ve learned so much more. My heart is covered in gold is how I look at it because I have so much heartbreak and pain. A lot of it I caused myself. I truly did. At 66, I have a heart of gold because of all my scars and the things I’ve learned in my past.

 

 

It’s a beautiful illustration. You’ve seen beautiful pieces that have that gold in them. I originally thought that was the way they did it.

There is a picture of what I wanted to put on my book. It’s the actual heart with all these gold threads running through it. This is what I want to do with my book so people can look at it and think, “That’s very interesting.” A lot of people haven’t heard of this.

It truly is a vision of the same concept.

Jesus has scars. He was not ashamed of his scars. That’s a sign of love. That’s how much love you’ve given. That’s how much love you poured into someone else but you got to give it to yourself. That’s the whole thing.

Your forthcoming book, and you haven’t honed in 100% on the title but it’s From Heartbreak to Wholeness: Unlocking the Key to Self-Love. You are onto something with that. That’s beautiful and exactly what you’re trying to do. As we move forward through this mastermind and our friendship, we can perhaps throw out some surveys. “What do you think of this title versus this title?” Let’s do things like that. It’s not hard to do. We can get some research. I love Heartbreak to Wholeness. That is huge and beautiful.

It’s cathartic to talk about your feelings, heartbreak, vulnerabilities, and the things that you’re ashamed of. Sometimes it’s a freeing concept. I haven’t gotten there 100% but I’m getting there. I’m coming along.

It is cathartic to talk about your feelings, your heartbreak, your vulnerabilities, and the things that you're ashamed of. Click To Tweet

Recognize and acknowledge how incredibly impactful that realization and these moments in time are. We’re right here. We’re shaking the world because we know we’ve got wisdom. I earned every one of these silver hairs the hard way.

Experience is a big thing.

I call them wisdom. There is nothing but wisdom shooting out of these roots and learning the hard way.

I like what you’ve also said about words because I’ve been practicing that a lot every morning. “I’m blessed, grateful, thankful, and receiving.” I’m getting what has been taken away from me. I’m restored to what was taken from me. It makes you stronger.

You’re trying to bring women along and help our humanity to have the confidence of growing higher and being better. The words matter. When I say every word matters, every word matters. We say, “I’m so tired.” Why don’t we say, “I’m refreshed, pumped, or energized?” You may have something that the experts tell you you’ve got something but if you want to claim the truth, your body has everything inside of it to heal yourself. You’ve got your immune system and every single thing inside of you to heal yourself. Deuteronomy 7:15 in many other places says, “You shall be free of every disease.” We were not taught to claim that. We’re taught the opposite of that. You got to run to the doctor every second.

 

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks

 

A lot of people grow up that way. “When you get older, you get that way.” I’m around a lot of seniors. I teach fitness classes for seniors and they’re always going to the doctor.

I haven’t been to a doctor for years. This is part of it. This isn’t religion and it’s not arrogance. Jesus gave us the authority to do what he did and even more. We can claim that we can do what he did and even more. John 14:12, I believe, is a verse. Why aren’t we taught the authority? I don’t believe in getting sick so I don’t get sick. That is authority.

It’s easier to be negative than positive.

I’ve trained myself so much so there’s almost none and that’s over the years for whatever reason. Let’s speak what you want, not what you don’t want. Speak health, not disease. Speak life, not death. Every word matters.

Another thing in the book I talk about is being joyful. How do you be joyful? That is the key to an abundant life. I’ve got all kinds of tips in my book on how to be joyful and what you have to do. You have to train yourself. You can’t automatically wake up sometimes and be joyful. You have to acknowledge that.

It’s a path and a choice.

If you’re in a heartbreak situation, you lose your job, or you’re grieving, you have to understand that the universe and God heard conversations you didn’t hear and saw things you didn’t see for your future. You have to acknowledge, “This is for my best good. Even though I was hurting, this person was not my ideal partner.”

 

 

Circumstances are there. Where we are in this split second, everything since the beginning of time, since the light has brought us to having this conversation with you and me right here, there’s not one thing that we can change about the past second, minute, hour, or decade. We cannot change one thing that way. We have only this second to choose, “Am I going to make a better choice?” If you don’t like where you are, relax, release, and let it go.

When you get upset, learn to relax, release, and let it go. That comes from Michael Singer. You got to deal with what’s here but with a different attitude or perspective of, “This is the only place I have. I might as well love it and take care of what’s next.” I want to challenge you on one little thing because, as far as the key, joy is an incredible part of the key. Gratitude is the key.

I don’t think you can have joy without gratitude.

You say thank you for what’s good and what’s not so good.

What happened to you in the past might have been bad, your fault, or somebody else’s fault but it doesn’t matter.

You cannot change one second in that direction.

The only thing I can say is that I’ve learned all these years. I’m happy with myself and where I am. Mainly, I wanted to write a book but it was a catalyst for me to jump on and think I’m not the only one dealing with this, that’s felt this way, and that’s been through all these circumstances. There are so many others. That’s how I got started.

I’m so excited. I cannot wait to read it. I believe that you write things most of the time for yourself. That’s what you’re saying, cathartic, and finding your story in a very unique way, the way I found Michael Butler of Beyond Publishing and you did too, randomly. Here we are. Having a published book, I’ve had one for years and it’s relaunched as a hardback in the fifth-anniversary edition.

I’m excited about it. It’s Candy Bar Hugs: It Doesn’t Take Much to Make a Difference! It gives a piece of credibility and a sense of credibility to you that you’re an expert. It’s a book at the back of the room. I give mine out most of the time. It’s so tiny that it’s like a business card book. “You wrote a book?” Many people want to and a lot of people don’t.

Being an expert in what not to do, I don’t know if that’s the best thing. It’s catchy.

You probably learn more from your stories and go, “Don’t do it.” How far along are you in the book?

A lot has been written already. I’ve got probably close to 100 pages written. That’s the front and back of 8 by 10. I don’t know how to gauge how much I have. I thought maybe sometimes it might be split into maybe different books. I don’t know.

It could be a series, certainly. You can do early, middle, and lessons learned.

Live love, love lives, lessons learned. It’s something I said in our mastermind. Finding Michael has been a miracle, I’m telling you. Everything that happens in life to me is a miracle.

In 2007, someone gave me the word. They said, “I believe that you’re a clearing for miracles.” I’m like, “I’ll receive that.” When you are open to miracles, there sure are a lot more of them. They’re everywhere. In my estimation, every single solitary breath is a miracle. When you can breathe in, in that split second, you are okay.

If you’re in the gutter, in a car, or in the worst place on Earth, if you can take a breath, you’ve been provided for it until that split second. Until you don’t have another breath, you are okay in that split second. We can start receiving that and believing that. Take a deep breath. I have a friend that says, “Keep breathing free oxygen.” I’m like, “Yeah, on this side of the dirt in Texas.” We’re blessed. If you can take a breath, you’re okay.

Going to the grocery store, you see people so sad and downtrodden. They don’t look happy at all. If you smile at them, their face lights up. It’s amazing.

Candy Bar Hugs is a pay-it-forward book. I started offering. People were buying big bucks for the people behind them. I thought the cashiers probably thought it was great. They’re sitting there, barely making it. I started offering a candy bar and then said, “Do you mind if I give you a hug?” That’s where those stories came from for that book. One lady was like, “You have no idea. I found out my mom is terminal.” They’re human beings. They’re people too. They need love. I call it infinite love or unconditional love. It’s just love. The harder people are to love, the more they need it.

Everyone is going through something. Every day that you see them, everyone is going through a trial, a heartbreak, or a disappointment.

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks
Deep Heartbreaks: Everyone is going through something every day you see them. Everyone is going through a trial, a heartbreak, or a disappointment.

 

It’s things that you can’t see.

It’s been great for me to take a step back out of myself. Getting away from myself is what I’ve been doing. I’m getting more into God, the universe, and having him guide me and lead me. That’s mainly all I want.

Listen to your heart. Your gut is huge. I’m going to look real quick to see if I can find the meme I saw. It’s probably like, “Your gut feeling is your angels protecting you.”

Rejection is sometimes redirection. It was something I read. If you’re rejected from a job, a person, or anything, it’s God taking you to a different path. If you think you know what you need and what you want, you don’t. God knows what you need. The universe or whatever how you want to put it knows what you need. If you are in a heartbreak or a situation where you can’t seem to rise above, you have to think of it that way versus, “Why am I going through this?”

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks
Deep Heartbreaks: God knows what you need. If you are in a heartbreak, you have to think of it that way.

 

Everybody’s going through stuff. It’s not just you. That’s what you were saying. This says, “Gut feelings are guardian angels.” I love that. In your daily life, you just moved. I know you were doing all that and you got a lot going on. You got to get settled.

This is fun. Moving is not fun.

Moving is not necessarily fun. We’re in Texas. It’s 103 degrees. It’s hot to move but it’s a new beginning. It’s a fresh start.

Everyone can have new directions. They have to choose wisely. I am the author of not choosing very wisely. If you start choosing wisely, then you’re going to have happiness, joy, calmness, and peace. That’s how I look at it.

Tell me a little bit about spending many years of fitness training. You are with seniors. You’re probably working with peers almost, people your age and a little bit older. You’re keeping them active. What does that look like?

It’s very fun. We have oldies music. We play the oldies, which they love and sing. Everybody’s singing and we’re doing weights. I’m not easy on them. They don’t want you to baby them. When you get our age or older, they want your independence. Our goal is to keep our strengths, flexibility, and cardio. We do it all. I’ve gotten into seniors in the last few years. I pretty much did all kinds of classes, fitness, and things like that. I’ve done seniors. I focus more on that.

Do you do nutrition or just exercise?

I tell people how to eat. I do try to tell them to get their protein, which is very important when you’re exercising. I do try to tell them to get up every day and drink lots of water. Whether that sinks in or not, it’s another story. A lot of us, our age, are set in our ways. I don’t think I am.

I’m like, “Bring it. What else do I need to know? What else can I learn? How else can I make a difference?”

When you get to this point, you want quality of life. You can still move, run, and play pickleball, which I do. I do all kinds of exercises and weight training for myself. I’ve leg pressed up to 600 pounds myself. I am staying the course.

That’s your lifestyle and because it’s your livelihood or that’s been your mindset. I have my two-and-a-half minutes of Sonicare shuffle with my toothbrush and walking in place.

It’s all in your head. That’s why placebos work.

It’s designed to heal itself and every single thing. I have a friend who when she breaks a bone chooses to self-heal. She can do it. Most of us wouldn’t want to persist through that pain that way but that’s doable. I’ve witnessed it so many times. What’s your completion date on this book? I can’t wait to read it.

I’m still adding things every day. It’s at the publisher. I don’t know what they’re doing with it.

You’re submitting it to Beyond Publishing, the publishing company, as you write it so that they can edit it as they go.

I’ve been sending it to them. I don’t know how far it’s gotten but Michael is so good at getting back to you if they have a question or something doesn’t sound right. I’m brand new. You’re the author’s expert.

I wrote a 28-page tiny book.

You got your books too, I see.

They’re not out yet. We’re doing all we can do. We’re going to make a difference.

I’m one person. I’m good.

People are always searching for purpose. What if your purpose is how you treat the person right in front of you? What do you think of that? You can touch that person right in front of you like the person at the checkout line in the grocery store. I’m not a shopper. I don’t get out that much. I was in the airport four times and I was like, “Are they zombies? Are they aliens?” I believe they’re walking medications. They are overmedicated. They’re mutants from so many things that perhaps the pharmaceutical companies have given us. They might be partially effective.

To me, a lot of people are weighed down in their spirit.

That’s a great way of putting it. They don’t have any hope. This is what my show is for. This is what you’re doing. You’re writing on what not to do and the senior dating scene, how to not be taken advantage of, and how to love yourself enough.

If you even want to do that. Maybe you’ll decide, “I’m to that point. I’m over it.” Work on yourself. Work on guiding, being with yourself, and loving yourself. Make each day a great positive and beautiful day, as you say.

 

TCAS 17 | Deep Heartbreaks

 

You’re amazing at that. We started talking but it’s like, why would we sell ourselves short? Find out who we are so strongly. We have confidence. Know our values. We are so set with our vision. I was at a retreat with eleven women. I was the fourth oldest. There were three ladies older than me. One of them runs this whole global Win Win Women platform, Paula Fellingham. We were in this whole group together and then there’s this group of dynamic young ladies changing the world in everything they do. It’s fun to see. Know that so many of us in this age range are linked within.

Another thing I wanted to mention is that when you have healed yourself and you are empowered, you will attract the person you deserve and the high quality. When you think about yourself, it’s what you attract. If you have low value for yourself, you’re going to attract low value. That’s what I’ve done. I’m stepping up the ladder.

How did you recognize that you were not who you needed to be?

Going through some of the things I went through with my last relationship, that clicked in me and took me down to my knees. That made me realize, “What am I doing? Why am I doing this to myself? This is horrible. Why would you, at 66, put yourself through this? Why could you not recognize this?” I felt stupid and ignorant. That made me cry and I grieved so much over it. You let people give you the value they think you should have and it’s not always the best value.

It’s looking for love in all the wrong places. We think we need somebody. I’m living proof. I do not. I’m happy and content. I live in joy. I’ve got so many things I don’t have time to do yet.

That’s me too. There are people that want to get out and do the dating thing. It’s fun to find people and go out to dinner.

Maybe taking it slowly would be a good piece of advice. It’s not like desperation because desperation is not attractive.

That was some of me too. I felt desperate. You feel like you’re not worth some stuff. You grasp when people say, “I love you,” or whatever they say to you. It is very needy.

You were married for 30 years. You’ve got family, children, and others that care for you. Thirty years is a long time to be with someone. You also suggested that your life was a mess and you made lots of bad choices. It wasn’t just this last one. When we can be authentic, it gives other people permission to go, “If she could get overcome that, maybe I could.”

I’ve been married three times so this was my third one and it was going to be my last one for real. I put it in God’s hands. I chased him. He did not chase me. You should never, ever chase someone. That’s the number one rule. You’re the flower. They are the bee. They should come to you. You do not ask a man out. You do not chase a man. You don’t do any of that.

It’s a little bit of the old-fashioned rules when we were growing up. I’m sure that there’s some variation in that, at least.

There is. I’ll never do it again. I’m not going to chase anybody. I don’t need anybody that bad. That was the whole thing with my last marriage. He didn’t call me. I don’t even know how we got married, to tell you the truth, but probably because I asked. Never again. Never chase anyone.

Don’t settle. You got your gut instincts. You know in your knower. We’re a senior here but don’t rush it. Give it time and enjoy the journey if it’s fun, exciting, or relaxing and you feel lifted. My standards are they’ve got to love God and people and they got to want a mutual partnership. “I lift you. You lift me.” Those are my top three, I believe. I don’t have time to mess with somebody and all that.

I was to the point that if God wants me to be with someone, it’ll happen. I will tell you the only reason I got on this dating site. I was watching a relationship coach and it said that’s the best way to meet people. I’ve never been on the internet. I’ve never dated that way. It was always a blind date. The first guy on the shoot went badly. I’m like, “I’m backing up. I’m going to do my thing with me.” That’s why how I started this book. It lifted me and made me realize that everybody’s quality of life is important.

I’m so grateful that you have realized that in time to live the rest of your life with your integrity.

It does upset me sometimes that I feel like I wasted those years but I don’t feel like I wasted because it’s more of an experience. It did happen. It made me who I am now or I wouldn’t be able to talk about it. I look at it like that instead of being a wasted thing.

Living with one’s regrets is very self-defeating. This is the way I would suggest to people wanting to meet someone. If you love hiking, go out and go hiking and find a hiking group. There’s somebody in there that you’ll hike with together and figure this out. Maybe there’s more conversation, discourse, and core beliefs. “Where are we?” If you love swimming, there are groups. You do them because you want to do them. In church, I don’t want to join a singles group.

They’re in for a reason.

Do what you love to do. Be out there. Turn the TV off a little bit. Breathe outdoors and get some grounding. Even if it’s walking, there are groups that do walking. We can find them so much easier. Maybe you like sewing. I don’t care. Find what you love and be you.

Do the hobbies you love. Once you have heartbreak, that’s the best thing to do. Live your life, get a hobby, and move forward. That’s how you go.

Do the hobbies you love. Once you experience heartbreak, that's the best thing to do. Live your life, get a hobby, and just move forward. Click To Tweet

Whatever you love to do, like gardening, find the people that love to do that as well. They’ll get out there. Maybe you’re digging a trench with somebody and having a conversation. Who knows? That is the only way. I call it organically. Even at the grocery store. You’re standing there and somebody has a conversation. You go, “Let’s have a cup of coffee.” It sounds simple and it’s not, I’m sure. I don’t have an antenna.

I’m not a good picker, either.

You are a bad picker, whoever said that. Say that because we’re going to shift that.

It’s already done shifted. My son did find his mate online but that’s a younger generation. To me, at this age, it’s different. I don’t know.

I’ve met people. I had a lady and they’re riding motorcycles all over the country and having a great time. I know many successful people that have met online so I wouldn’t say never but I would be discernment. Let those guardian angel gut minders. Listen to it. This is another thing. Be your best self. I was telling kids a long time ago in one of the things I’ve done that jealousy is the most wasted emotion on the face of the Earth. If you ever feel jealous about somebody, be your best self every second of every day. If you’re not and they don’t appreciate that, bye-bye. I don’t have that gene. Don’t let that jealousy get you checking people’s phones and stuff like that. If you can’t trust them and they don’t trust you, it’s bye-bye.

They’re not your ideal partner. They’re not for you.

We get into these little games we play. How do people find you? We’ll get you some landing pages, websites, and things real soon but for now, the best way is Facebook, if I’m not mistaken.

I have Instagram too. Instagram is like dog lovers because that’s one of my priorities. They have to love dogs. I’m a dog person. Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

Veta Newton on Facebook. What is it on Instagram?

You can still type in my name and pull up but it’s under Dog Lover or something like that.

I’m not on Instagram or at least not at much. What is your most important message? If you could talk to the person that is going through like, “What have I done? I picked the wrong one,” or looking to go in that direction, what do you want to tell your reader?

It’s not your fault that it didn’t work out. It’s not their fault. It wasn’t just compatible. You’re not the right person. If they’re not the right person, you don’t want to be with them. That’s my best advice. If things aren’t compatible and the chemistry is not there, they’re not your ideal person. You need to accept that and not try to dwell on it, chase after it, or be jealous. Accept that God is guiding you toward something better.

 

 

Cut your losses at some point. The whole message for you and me is to love yourself enough.

You don’t have enough self-esteem. That was me, I do not have a self-esteem for myself.

Love yourself enough to value that you are perfect exactly who and where you are. There’s not one thing you can do to have God love you more or less.

He has a lot to offer.

Every single human being is created with that gift and we forget it. We allow the outside media to come in, brainwash us, and tell us that we’ll only be good enough if we don’t have any wrinkles. I’m sorry. Not it at all. You are perfect exactly who and where you are right this split second. If you don’t believe it, you contact Charla at Charla@CharlaAnderson.com or Veta Newton. We are going to get that message to you. If you need help with that, find help. We’re here. We’re going to read Veta’s book, Heartbreak to Wholeness.

You’re perfect exactly who and where we are. Life is beautiful and stuff happens but it’s not who we are. It doesn’t define us. Remember that who we are is a choice every single second. Every single second, we get to choose if we’re going to make a better change in our life or we’re not. We can’t change that last second. We can change the next one. Remember that that is huge. Love exactly who and where you are. You’re beautiful and spectacular. Be you and know you are enough. Veta, I can’t thank you enough for being with me and having a fun conversation. All I want to do is offer hope and let people see that we are all overcomers.

No matter what you’ve been through, yes. It doesn’t matter how many relationships you’ve been in. I’ve probably had more than any of you. Know that it’s a stepping stone toward your greatness. That’s all it is.

It’s beautiful that you did a change. You shifted. You did something different. You are going to bless the world with your wisdom, knowledge, and practical insights on how to do something different. Charla Anderson, the Charla Anderson Show, Collector & Connector of Fascinating People (and EVERYONE is Fascinating, especially YOU!). I cannot wait for you to join us again next time. Listen to the replays on CharlaAnderson.com and WinWinWomen.com. WinWinWomen.tv has a boatload of beautiful TV shows and wisdom to offer to the world. We are global and going big-time global. Thank you for joining us. You are amazing. Always remember, choose joy.

I’m Charla Anderson, host of The Charla Anderson Show, Collector & Connector of Fascinating People (and EVERYONE is Fascinating!) on live TV, streaming and podcasts. As a Ziglar Legacy Certified Trainer, a retired award-winning flight attendant, Olympic Torch bearer, personal development junkie, Inspired Speaker, Published Author and Your Courageous Coach, I want to share my passion of living life full-out, saying YES to intriguing opportunities, and encouraging YOU to do the same. Let’s jump on a discovery call and get to know each other. Find all things Charla at CharlaAnderson.com/links.

On The Charla Anderson Show, We discuss Mindset, How much Your WORDS matter, Princess to Queen energy, mantras, HOPE, Faith, Miracles, Overcoming, and much, much more, including learning from amazing guests.

Everything Charla: https://CharlaAnderson.com/links/

Live show every Wed at 1 pm CT.

https://WinWinWomen.tv/show/the-charla-anderson-showThe WATCH Button turns green at 12:58 to join the live show. Also streamed on Roku, Amazon Fire, and Apple TV.

All replays are on my website, https://CharlaAnderson.com/tv-shows/

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About Veta Newton

TCAS 17 | Deep HeartbreaksGuiding women over 40, by learning our value and embracing our imperfections. My name is Veta Newton. I am 66 years of age. I have been in the fitness industry for over 35 years. I currently teach fitness to seniors, from yoga, stretching, and weight and cardio.

I am writing a book currently, wanting to share my experiences about my own poor choices in relationships, and how one’s perspective about themselves can have an impact on your future. In a world filled with shattered dreams and bittersweet romances, I’ve embarked on a journey to unravel the complexities of heartbreak and rediscover the power of self-love.

In my forthcoming book, ‘From Heartbreak to Wholeness: Unlocking the Key to Self-Love,’ I delve deep into the intricacies of heartbreak and share my powerful strategies to reclaim your worth, attract the ideal partner, and build lasting, fulfilling relationships.”

My name is Veta Newton, 1st time author, and an expert in what not to do in relationships. I can teach you creative ways to value yourself by setting limitations and boundaries.

Can you remember or are you currently experiencing heartbreak? The kind of heartbreak, that literally hurts in your chest, like something heavy, emotional numbness, overwhelming sadness, stomach ache loss of appetite, etc

Collector & Connector of Fascinating People... & everyone is Fascinating!  Sharing Encouragement, Courage, Inspiration, Smiles & Hugs to Leave OUR World a Better Place.

TV SHOW ~ SEASON 2 - Join me Every Wed at 1pm CT on BE EMPOWERED Channel 

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