From a Massively Abusive Past to a Transformed Life

From a Massively Abusive Past to a Transformed Life

About Terri Moore

Terri Moore’s story is one of unbelievable redemption, from addiction, dealing street drugs, deception & massive abuse, to becoming a powerful speaker, transformational coach, best-selling author & now a movie about her life. Terri Moore, Certified Professional Women’s Speaker, Certified Transformational Coach, Best-Selling Author  

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Introduction

Good, beautiful day, beautiful, beautiful souls! This is Charla Anderson, host of the Charla Anderson Show~Collector & Connector of Fascinating People (& EVERYONE is Fascinating!), especially you.

Today, Terri Moore. Her story is so unbelievable, it’s a redemption story from massive addiction, massive drug dealing in the streets. You’d think this sweet little lady would have just had a little peaceful life. 

Well the worst day of her life, when she was robbed – had a gun in her neck raped, the worst day of her life turned in the best day of her life, and we’re going to learn all about that, and how that all happened.  …BUT FIRST…

Today, as always, we’re going to take that first little mini vacation, a 22 second little breathing exercise. We’re going to breathe in some calm. We’re going to hold for 4 seconds and then breathe out 11 seconds of gratitude. So let’s just jump in and get some grounding and centeredness. Breathe in calm for 7 seconds.

Hold, relax, release  Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you for joining me on our little be still moment. I do that every week. I just feel like we’re so attached to our little machines, our little devices that we sometimes don’t take time to be still and know and hear that still, small voice. You’re going to be blown away today I am. I am so thrilled that Leann Lyon, our mutual friend, another show host, Leann Lyon, from Lead With Leann, is her TV show and Joy Minder is her business.

She introduced me to Terri Moore, because her story is off the charts unbelievable. So many things have happened to her in her life, and the most exciting thing as of this week. There’s going to be a movie made about it. And can you believe that? So, Terri, this is so fun. If you know, we just have conversation. It’s just fun. So I want to hear who you are in this world now, and we’ll talk about how you got there, and a little bit about what you’re doing now.

Sure. Absolutely. Thank you, Charla, so much for having me, and it’s a blessing. I’m always feeling blessed when somebody wants to hear my story. So where am I at today? At 68 years old, 68 years young. I am a certified, transformational coach, comma, bestselling author of a book called Face to Face with God, my best friend.

I am also a certified professional storytelling speaker and I absolutely love being on stages where I can just empower individuals to be their very, very best. And when I tell my story it’s so funny because you cannot hear a pin drop. So I’m gonna tell that story in a little bit. But right now I am. I have so many projects going on. I’m sure Charla’s going to ask me about that later. I live in Greensboro, North Carolina, and I’m married to my husband of 30 years, and I have a little fur baby named Lily that’s going to be turning 14 next month.

Yes.

14. 0 dog lives, man, yeah, so I had a little dog named Joy, and then I found out my name means Joy. A lot of story around all that. My signature is, choose joy. And you know then, my pastor said, my name means joy in Greek. I’m like that’s very, very cool.

So where do you want to start with this? Do you want to start with your story, the way you’re a master storyteller is what I understand. And do you want to start with your story? Do you want to start? This is, you know I call it your show. So what feels right for you right now, because we’re very in tune to what, where, when we’re being led sometimes in these conversations.

Sure, absolutely well.

My life started living in a dysfunctional family. I had parents that were alcoholics.

I had a brother who bullied me, said things to me like, you’re trash or nobody’s going to want you. Nobody’s going to love you. And then I had my mom always saying, Why can’t you be like so-and-so? So I grew up in that family of not feeling like I was worthy enough not feeling like I was good enough. I went. I tried to, you know. Come home and tell my mom. Oh, I want to be a professional dancer, and you know she was like, dream on. 

Well, guess what? I auditioned for the New York Rockettes and I made it in the audition, but then I fell playing volleyball, and I broke my elbow, and that disqualified me literally broke my heart, you know, so I didn’t. I was my own cheerleader. 

But then, when I was in kindergarten, it was supposed to be your most independent day of your life, you say? Bye, bye, mommy! Bye, bye, daddy. But what happened was within 5 seconds, a little boy named Jim Brockie walked up to me and he said, Why does your hair look like it’s been put in a light socket? Why do your clothes look like they came out of a dumpster? And why are you so ugly? 

So I want to tell you something, Charla. Those things that he said to me held me hostage for many, many years because at 5 years old your self-esteem is starting to be transformed, and you’re starting to understand more about yourself. But, gosh! I just warped up my self confidence immediately.

then I you know, I worked my jobs and everything like that. But I did not have the confidence that I do today. And so fast forward a little bit. 

When I was 27 years old I thought I met the man of my dreams only to find out one day, after going through some baby pictures that I ran across to document that just changed my whole entire life. It said my ex-husband’s name versus the State of Indiana Penitentiary. and that got my attention very clear, and I started going through the document. And next thing I know. I realized that my husband of today, that I was madly and I mean my husband back then, that I was madly in love with was in prison for 1st degree murder.

You see, he told me he was in the Marine Corps for 9 years before we met, and then one day, all of a sudden I discover he’s a murderer. And what do you do with that? My whole glass ceiling of my life just completely. It just completely shattered like glass. And so long story short, I didn’t go back with him at that. There’s a long story behind that. But he came to my parents house and my dad. Mom was hiding me.

But then he made the comment, well, if she doesn’t go back with me, I’m going to go home and kill her cat and burn the house down and all her belongings. Well, I’m dealing with the murder, so I have to believe him right. So I did go home. I went in the car with them. It was horrible, and when I got in the house that’s when he started hitting me, abusing me, kicking me in the face, you know, doing all kinds of different things. I’m just. I always walked around bruises on my face. Then he held me hostage for many, many months. I couldn’t go out unless he knew exactly where I was going. I had to report to him, and he was having affairs on me constantly and coming home and telling me about it. And so during that time frame, I became a full fledged alcoholic because he was holding me my money hostage. I went out and became a drug dealer in our neighborhood of cocaine.

I did cocaine myself, and then that wasn’t enough money coming in. So I went out and went to the local bar and became the number one female pool hustler in the State of Indiana. It was so funny, Charla, because I would literally have people walk in, and they’re like, Well, I’m here to play Terri Moore, Terri Bracken at the time, and I go, well, that’s me. And these men were like, Oh, well, this is going to be a piece of cake, because I thought this was going to be a guy. And so they walked out $2,000 poorer.

I would walk out $2,000 richer

Yeah, that’s nice.

I know. So after we divorced, I looked in the mirror the day after. and I said, Okay. you have got to get your act together. So I talked to myself. I said, You’re going to go to the shopping center. And this is where I used to work. I used to play around, you know, when I was a kid and what I said to myself is, you’re going to go and buy some makeup to cover these awful bruises.

And you’re going to go and get some nice clothes to make yourself feel better. And I was starting to perk up a little bit, you know. But then everything changed. I went to the shopping center. I was trying to walk into the department store. A man I thought was just going to ask me the time of day, decided he wanted to put a knife to my throat and walk me back to my car, threw me over the passenger side. I asked him, what did he want? What he wanted? He says a little bit of sex and a little bit of money would be nice and I said, Well, you can’t rape me. I’m already pregnant. But I didn’t know I was pregnant at the time.

But he did not rape me. He did want me to do a sexual act on him but thank God, it was just not right, because I’d be dealing with a whole bunch of other emotions. And so the beauty when I’m on stages. Charla, I say this don’t have sympathy for me, because this turned out to be the most beautiful day of my life. And that’s why they are doing a movie about this complete situation is because I knew my life was at stake. He had a knife to my throat. He had a knife to my breast, I mean he’d alternate, and basically I prayed. I said, God, I don’t know who you are. I don’t worship you. I’m a full fledged sinner. but if you get me out of this situation alive. I will turn my life over to you for the remainder of my days. 2 seconds later, the knife goes off my throat.

He opens the car door, and he tells me to get out. He says he’s going to go pick up his girlfriend. He’s gonna park my car in the parking lot, and I can do whatever the excuse me, hell I want. And so what happened was, I walked in the department store, and I completely had a nervous breakdown. and there’s a lot more to it. I don’t want to steal the thunder of the movie. I will get in trouble from my producer. Anyway, 2 weeks later they found him.

I sent him to prison for 30 years, for 7 different accounts. And then, 3 weeks after that I was met at a restaurant that I was waiting to see where the person asked me if I wanted to go to her boyfriend’s Bible talk. and I was going pool hustling that night. So everything kind of just changed. And as a result, now I’ve been walking with God for 38 years and loving it.

So your worst day was your best day, and that with a few details missing, in that you know all the details and all that horrific time. And you know, I want to say, go back to your kindergarten. This is what I say a lot on my show and the people. My message is, people are. They don’t love themselves enough to know how to love others, and they hurt people, hurt people. And those bullies, those little 5 year old boys. Where were his? What was going on in his life? Right? 

I don’t know. I can’t even imagine, and it’s just horrific that I was allowed to go on through the whole elementary years with the same young man. But you know what a tragedy for him, and I don’t not belittle what yours but and what do you think? I mean? 

That’s a different direction. I had no idea I was gonna ask that question. But what do you think that you know would cause someone just as right off the bat, belittle someone so much, because, you know, they wasn’t born that way

Right, and sometimes it is from the home. He could have another sibling that was bullying him, making him feel bad about himself, because when I coach people. One thing I find out quickly, they’re critical on themselves. And then when they start talking about other people, I’m picking it up that they’re also critical of them, too.

So what I try to do is help to show them that the reason you’re being critical and gossiping about these people is because you’re just not happy with your own life. And so there could have been something there that triggered him. I don’t know. I tried to find him on Facebook.

Terrible time.

One that is that angry and upset from childhood unless he gets some strong support. It’s it, you know. He’s probably not a happy person. And I, you know. Funny that I just picked up on that little piece, you know, so I don’t know but it’s not a little piece. But it is part of the pieces of your story when we’re all watching people when there’s that God shaped hole in our heart.

We keep trying to find a way to fill it and make other people feel bad. You know the bully, the bully mindset, you know, making others feel bad, so we feel better. But it doesn’t work. It backfires a hundred percent of the time. They don’t, you know. So it’s not a. Our society’s not been very good at managing these things in a big way.

I used to be a very critical person. and I heard a lot of people, and one of the reasons why, if that’s just critical on myself because I didn’t know who I truly was, because people kept telling me who I wasn’t. You’re not good enough. You’re not pretty enough. You’re not smart enough. You’re not. You’re fat, you know, and they were just hell. They were feeding me all these lies. But what happens is you believe them because your self-esteem starts really shaping up, and self image really starts shaping up at 4 years old, believe it or not.

I think, yeah, at least, maybe even before. So that you know we internalize it, and we have no way of knowing it. As a 5 year old, what you know, what what truth is, what’s reality and and not and so and then your lack of self-confidence, and then your lack of you know. I mean, I’m so proud of you for going to be a rocket and actually making it, I’m you know, sadly. Your dream, you know your dreams got dashed with no fault of your own right, an accident, or whatever, and so took a trajectory that we may not have intended or expected. But you

Right.

You had the drive to do stuff

I still do

If you can become a professional ice skater and a professional dancer, you know there’s something deep inside of you that does want or did want recognition and acknowledgement in a good way. So

Thank you for sharing that. I actually went on to be the number one saxophone player, too. But that was for Daddy’s approval, and sometimes we don’t really understand why we feel we need to have approval, seek approval. and I’ll be honest with you. In my 14 years of coaching. It comes down to this, daddy issues.

If your dad did not pay attention to you as a child and nurture you and kiss you and hug you. This is what happens. Number one, you’re going to go seek it from another man. You’re going to seek it from another boy in the neighborhood, or whatever the case might be, and that’s in my case. That’s what I did. because I knew my dad loved me. But he did not show it.

So basically what it boils down to is our dads can force us to go into the hands of the wrong men.

And they, you know my dad didn’t realize it back then that you know that generation. They were so cold, and you know they didn’t. They didn’t really talk much about their feelings, and they just didn’t love their children like they should. And you know that that has warped a lot of people in the baby boomer stage. Oh, and so you know. So therefore we have to. We just have to learn to love ourselves in a greater way. That’s all there is to it.

Exactly so we’re looking at back at that time, but the times were different. There was no Internet, you know. There was no you you really had to look for somebody to or to have an innate family familial support system or neighborhood something to even know to have a reflection of it. You didn’t. There wasn’t all that self-reflection. I’m guessing that there may have been more than we know that. But you know, lay in bed at night wishing they hadn’t done what they did or whatever. 

But there was and they were, you know, a man, didn’t you know they were John Wayne. They were tough, you know, tough, but

They are tough.

Yeah, I had to stay that tough self. But they didn’t love themselves enough either, to know how to love real, genuine love. So my message, my message is unconditional love.

Yes, absolutely.

Unconditional forgiveness and not unconditional boundaries. See? That’s part of my story, you know, unconditional love, unconditional forgiveness, not unconditional boundaries. We do need to keep our protection, our shield of protection. Psalm 91, and our angels all around us to keep us shielded. so that we don’t allow that hurt to? No to penetrate, I guess, is anymore, you know. 

So you’ve got this coaching thing going on. Now you’ve got this movie going on. You’ve got and the movie just happened. You just you knew about it a couple months. But it just happened this week where you went. And they filmed that horrific day in your life where you were. You’re decided you’re going to go get some makeup. You’re decided you’re going to go get some clothes and you get almost raped, and you get a knife at your throat, and and death threatened, you know, that could have that could have sent you down even a worse path.

Oh yes!

But God right, but God! So something in you came in and says, you know, if you save me. I’ll follow you. So then, 3 weeks later, you get an invitation to a Bible study that you’d not know. I don’t talk about religion at all. I mean, it’s not religion. It’s just about who we are. God, the God in us. And when you made a promise, and you fulfilled on that promise.

Yes, I did.

And you know, the weirdest thing is that my mom and my brother took a bet. They yeah, they had a bet going on that I would last 6 weeks in the church because I would be wanting to go back out to the bars, dancing, drinking, playing pool.  And you know, I you know, I mean, people have their own convictions about this, but I believe that it’s okay to drink wine. You know. Just the Bible says you can drink. Just don’t get drunk right, don’t take the end of. 

Don’t take the dependency off of God, and I’ll never forget the day that we went to this Chinese restaurant for my mom’s birthday, and I had been. I had been a Christian for like 6 months. and I have not had one drink, not at all. But I ordered wine that day. Oh, my gosh! You had thought the universe was closing in because my mom and dad and my and my brother.

They’re like, you can’t drink  I go on.

Yeah, I can. I’m only gonna have a glass of wine. Well, we know now that you’re just going to go down that rabbit hole again. Well, I proved them all wrong. proved them all wrong. My brother said I never amount to anything. I was so proud when I took him to the organization that I started the domestic violence organization on sexual assault. 

I walked him through the office. My brother was very nonchalant. He didn’t have feelings. It was not like, Oh, I’m so proud of you, you know. but I wanted him to see that I did amount to something. and I wanted him to see it, anyway, because, you know, I talked about it so much. But our families can just mess us up. And so that’s why I know I have a stable job as a coach, because there’s too many families that are messing people up.

There’s not. There’s no lack of people that could use some help and coaching. And I, you know I do some coaching as well, and we, you know, we just and and I just actually my coach this morning said something about she’s like the leaders, the one there’s never you don’t ever get there right. So you always want to have some guidance. I I say this, you know, there’s therapy, and there’s coaching, and I in my brain. 

Coaching or therapy is kind of like, let’s you know you’re laying on the couch, and you know, let’s keep reviewing your past and past and past and past, and you stay mired there, whereas a coach is what’s all the unlimited possibilities, and you might need both. But ultimately you need to get off the couch and have some accountability. And so coaches, that’s what that’s what we’re here for.

Absolutely. You know, I’m all I’m all about, because I went on my own journey 30 some years ago. I wanted to find who I was, because people at my church they were like, Oh, you’re going to make such a great leader someday, or I love your dress, or you know I love your hair, and I’d be like just spitting these compliments back in their face without them even knowing it, and went home one night, and I said I just cried, and I was like God. I want to see in myself what people see in me, and I don’t, and I need your help. And so I said, We’re going to go on this spiritual discovery journey. And I did. And I ran across this book called Will the real me please stand up.

But changed my life so much that it’s the final chapter in my book, face to face with God, my best friend, and it was amazing, because every day I would start seeing some of the new Terri coming out.

You know, and it was like, it’s a war, though, you know you have Satan on one side, you have God on the other, and they’re pulling you. And yeah, exactly. And they’re talking to you, you know, you know. Oh, you’re going to do great! Oh, you’re going to do terrible! Oh, you know you’re so adorable! You’re so ugly. So basically, it took about 6 months of hard work. 

And gradually the new Terri came out, and when the new Terri completely came out I just fell in love with her. I would look in the mirror, Charla going. Who are you? You know. Where is the wear and tear on your face, you know. So that was

beautiful for me, you know. And so now everything that I went on my journey with I implemented. That’s my coaching program. Now. you know, claiming your get, reclaiming, your voice, removing those emotional triggers, you know forgiveness, self-esteem. vision, dreaming, you know, making your life come back to come back to the original blueprint that God created.

And having some fun.

Yes.

Don’t you think fun is a missing piece in our world? We’re so attached to our entertainment that we’re not really having fun, so that I think that giving permission to people to have fun and find out what that is for them is a big deal. And so I actually had this meeting this morning. I said something. They’re they’re talking about the flow of reciprocity, and you know, and and a giver can’t give. If a receiver won’t receive, you weren’t allowed you weren’t aware of. You could not receive the compliments because you couldn’t love yourself enough to receive them. And it blocks the flow when we do that.

Definitely does. Yes, you’re completely, completely right on that. And you know. when I asked this book asked me to ask myself on a scale of one to 1010 being the best. Where do you see yourself loving yourself back in the mirror? And I can only give me a 0,and the scale was one to 10 and so what happened was that I like? I said I worked on myself, and then I got to the loud and proud 10, and that was the most beautiful day because I knew I had arrived. I took it. I left the baggage at the bottom of the mountain. I climbed to the peak, and now I’m back down on the other side of the mountain. and that’s where the beautiful, beautiful scenery takes place. That’s where your life just starts transforming. And that’s when you start, you just start knowing that you can do anything that is put in your path.

And so now every session that I have with my clients they know right away. I’m asking that question every single time. and now some of them will start with me, and there’ll be a 1. There’ll be a 2, 3, 4, you know. And that gives me an indication of how long they’re going to be with me, and then, if they give me, you know, up to 6, 7, 8,

They’ve worked on themselves, but they still got a ways to go. And so that’s what I do. My result as a coach is to get them to that loud and proud Ted

Loud and proud. 10. 0, man, that’s very cool! And you wrote your book called that you, my best friend? Oh.

Face with God, my best friend.

Face with God, my best friend. So I’m curious about that.

Okay, what do you want to know?

Oh, just would you show it again

Yes.

For me, because, okay, there we go. Yeah, I happen to be looking at the camera instead of the screen. There we go. Yeah. is it on Amazon? Or is it just on your website? Which, by the way, let me just say it here, T E R R I Moore, M O O R E coaching.com terrimorecoaching.com Terri with an I, so we can And I know you have an autographs book on your website that you can send? Is it on Amazon and other places as well or

It is on Amazon.

Soon it will be on a lot of more outlets. We’re getting ready to relaunch this book. Excuse me. Second edition, second edition. And so yes, this book, you know, when you’re writing a book, and I’m sure I’m sure you probably felt the same way. When we write a book as an author, we have no idea what kind of impact it’s going to make.

But did you know that I took this book? and somebody reached out to me and it was a prison. What do they call them?

Prison wards now, anyway, president of the prison. Okay? And when he asked me to come in and do an 8 week Bible, a book series on my book. I got there, and it was like, I think I forgot to ask one question, is it female or male?

And it was all male

Wow!

And I had to sit in the room for the very 1st time. I was nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof. All these prisoners came in, and they were staring at me. Excuse me, and they’re like, Well, who are you? I said. I’m Terri. I’m the one that’s going to be doing the book series.

What? I don’t know anything about that. I’m not doing that. So, anyway. Long story short, went there faithfully for 8 weeks they fell in love with me. I fell in love with them, and they cried when I told them that’s my last time. and it was an experience that I will never forget. I never knew how this book would make an impact, but it is all over the world, and I’m sure yours is too

You know, mine has less of that type of impact. But it, you know, it’s still stories, you know, and making a difference, my tiny books. It doesn’t take much to make a difference. But writing this book about God being your best friend, so do you have any insights. And do you want to share around that

The title

How did that title, and even the message in that book come to pass?

Absolutely great question. 1st of all, I wrote the book face to face with God because I feel like I really have an intimate relationship with God. I can’t obviously see him face to face, but I can imagine it. So a lot of people. And that’s a great question. Because many people that interview me, they’re like, why did you call it my best friend?

Well, that’s because the incident that I just shared with everyone about the sexual assault attack. I felt like God saved me that day. and that day he became my best friend because he took me. He took me out of that car out of that traumatic situation where I could have been killed very easily, because there was a woman 3 weeks before me in the same shopping center that was murdered and stuffed in the trunk to die.

So I didn’t know if I was dealing with the same perpetrator. I didn’t know. So I when I prayed that prayer I instantly felt like something was coming my way in a good way, and that’s when he opened the car door, so I call him. I call God my best friend. Yes. and my husband knows that God’s here, families here, my dog. or sometimes, honestly, it’s God. It’s my dog. It’s my husband. It just depends on how. Yeah.

Well, relationships. That’s my 1st question. When I get there, I’m gonna say, you know, why are relationships so hard? Why can’t we just get along. And we got to deal with all this other stuff out here.

anyway.

So that’s interesting. So my book called Split Second Transformation ~Change Your words, Change Your Life. 31 daily practices. You can have a split second transformation. That is what you had in that moment of you know, calling out, God is present at all times, and there’s nothing you’re loved exactly who and where you are, no matter what. You can’t do anything to be loved more or less by God. And so, if God is love, he can’t be, not love. I say these kinds of things in my show quite often to help people remember that who you are is perfect exactly who and where you are right now. You don’t like it.

You don’t have anywhere from the past. You can’t change one of those things, but you can do what you did change the next step And and the next step, and take a you know moment to call out, reach out! You know. I believe with everything in me that there is who I say I am is both faith, no fear, and who you say are what, after I am, is who you are, and when I say that

bold fake no fear who I am. And then I got robbed at gunpoint, stepped towards the gun and said, You need love, and they ran

Oh, my! Gosh!

Yeah, I know I but I had no fear. You were probably in massive fear. I had no fear in that moment, and the reason I can say that is because who, whatever you say after I am is who you are. And I had said so many years, who I am is bold faith, no fear

God.

When I’m in that situation I was like, well, I guess I’ll win either way. I was, you know, and stepped towards them and said, You need love. And they ran. oh, wow! I was shaking.

It’s not. It’s not like I was. It was a party. It was like I was shaken. They did rob my new computer, my cowboy, boost my! I was at a convention, you know, all my stuff. but and massive inconvenience. But I had my life, and I think they, you know, little old lady walking up driveway probably was an easy target. No

Oh, well, you’re not a little old lady. Okay. What was the thing that you said? I am what I want to write this down.

Who I am.

Yeah, I am.

Who I am is bold, faith, no fear. That’s the words I got years ago, and that’s who I speak over my world, because whatever you say after I am.which is God’s name, and you’re taking it. You’re pulling that God’s name I am. It’s the God in you. I am bold, faith, no fear. I’m outrageously optimistic. I’m outrageously courageous. I speak what I want. 

And in this little tiny book this small book split second transformations. Change your words, change your life. 31 daily practices. I talk about every word matters so often, so often. We, you know, we, we condemn ourselves, we we, you know, pray for something, and then we go. Yeah, but I don’t have enough money. Yeah. 

But you know we don’t have that bold faith, no fear. And so, for whatever reason, I started speaking that and I’ve been, I’m at least I’m going to guess. 15 or 20 years ago I started calling myself that. And you know

I think every person that’s listening to this should do the same thing, and I’m going to implement it. I am bold, Faith, with no fear.

Yep.

Exactly so, I mean speak who you want. So this is. I’ve been convicted to this only in the last few months. I say, speak what you want, not what you don’t want, but want means lack. So what if you speak your desires And the desire is of desire, means of the Father.

Psalm 37, 4,

Of the father’s desire, so speak what you desire. and not what you want, because want is lack, and then don’t, don’t. This is the point I think I was trying to get to when I started. that you know you spoke what you desired, and you made a promise in that moment. In that split second you had a choice to succumb and be in fear are being faith, and that was faith.You didn’t know it.

That’s right. That’s very. That’s very true. I didn’t think about it like that. Yeah. So When you have been raised in a family of mistrust, betrayal, rejection, fear it just, it keeps keeps in your. It keeps in your soul, you know, until you learn to let it go. and I still struggle, struggle with fear. I’m not going to sit here and tell you I have a right, by any means, but I have been able to control it more and turn it into faith.And it’s really helped considerably as far as that. So great question

A few years ago, in 2020, I started. I started saying, Be prepared, not scared, be prepared, not scared. There’s so much more going on than me, so I am prepared, not scared. Don’t live in. Don’t succumb into that fear, because and I just somehow don’t know how to even express this. But you know, if you continue, go believing that you are saved, you know that you have a that you are saved, that you are safe and saved, and you continue acting in the faith as such, even if you’re in a really dire circumstance or crash, or whatever you know, if you can take a breath. You’re okay. In that moment.

You’re right.

And until you’re pushing up daisies on the other side of the dirt, right.

Right.

If you can take a breath, the breath of life. I am in you, the breath. Then you’re okay in that moment, and if you don’t like the circumstance, claim what you want, what you desire and keep. Take a different project trajectory of your next step. You can’t change the last step, only the next step right

Exactly, and if I can share this, I do workshops for a woman’s resource center. Here in Greensboro, I volunteer my time, and the one last one we did. It was all about Valentine’s day, and I had a sheet, and it said, I am, I am, I am. I am, and there’s like 10 of them right? And so I asked them to fill it out.

and then they had to stand up, and they had to share a couple of them. Do you know that there it’s was almost everyone in the room that all can only get to 3 and I’ll go. Okay. So we have 3 out of 10. So then I started coming in thinking, Okay. What do you like about yourself? And so when they started telling me what they like about. I said, Okay, so that I am.

You know I am strong, you know, because they are and that’s the thing. There’s so many of us women walking around the face of this earth that can’t give them. They can’t say positive things about themselves.

We minimize our our greatness.

Yes.

It’s a huge thing, my 3 year old granddaughter that comes often. She’s got. She’s got her I am’s, you know. She says, for months she was saying I am happy, I’m happy. And then now we’ve added, she remembers them all, amazing to me. I’m strong, I’m smart, I’m kind. 

Wow!

Because I’m kind, and I’m trustworthy, and we use that one a lot because I was like. I’m trusting you to sit right here while I run in the house for 1 min, and you know, you know, in the backyard, anyway, and she remembers them. She knows what they mean. She’s I am powerful, I can, I am brave, I can do hard things, I mean I and this last week I said, I have. I told her I said, I have integrity. So I’m teaching integrity, which means honoring your word. Being a person of your word.

Oh, my gosh! That’s amazing! You’re great! You’re a great Nana, are your grandma or Nana?

I’m Nana. I was Nana, but she calls me Nanny, so she I guess I’m Nanny to her

Yeah. I’m a Nana.

My mom was a Nana. My sisters were Nanas, but she changed it to Nanny, and that’s cute for me. It’s all good.

Yes, that’s very cute. And you said she’s 3. She turned 3 the day before I turned 71, which was at the end of November, so that 71, girl you look great.

I’m great. I choose. Great. Listen, I mean for me to change and be able to go. Oh, yeah, whatever. So I was a flight attendant for 34 years. I was in a class with an Nlp. And you know and and but at lunch he said, if I ever hear you say. Oh, I was just a flight attendant.

Oh!

34 year award winning flight attendant. So I was like, I was able to shift that. So since I was a 34 year award winning flight attendant raising 3 kids and 3 stepkids and the super mom, those pool parties, mom, we had the pool and neighborhood and the mission trip, mom. And you know, if I can do that, and I could get you know, I was a coordinator international on airplanes.

I can do anything right? 

You can do anything.

And it was just that split second of transformation that I shifted. I didn’t have a degree. So I was just a flight attendant for 34 years. It’s a lot. And I worked Max hours, and I commuted and and I managed a household like, you know. I don’t know, and I did layover. I love layovers, too. I was in Europe, and you know I don’t know. It was just great, but it was a great job for me if you’re comfortable with childcare, it was really great. 

But anyway, so what we speak about ourselves. You know, I have an Olympic torch I carried for the Salt Lake City Olympics, and it was behind this screen, and one day I took it downstairs. It’s hanging in my living room now, I mean, why not? It’s beautiful.

Oh, yeah.

Award. I mean, it was a huge honor to get to do that. A 100 people out of an 80,000 company people company delta airlines.

But huh!

A hundred people were chosen for that, and 100 people were chosen for Chairman’s club, which is another. So I had 2 major awards in that in my career that only 100 it was peer nominated, only 100 people got. And so I finally, I’m like, well, I was an award winning flight attendant, even, you know. So here I am, taking all this about me. I don’t want it to be about me. 

I think that you’re you’re you have the most overcoming the story I do, overcoming right? This is my, my, I want people to have hope. I want them to know that there’s something else out there that they can have hope. This is what my, the Charla Anderson show is about, and I would love it. 

If you guys would subscribe on Youtube might as well ask, I forget to ask right? So I get so involved in our conversation. subscribe on Youtube and go find this book that is about face to face with God. Can you imagine? And then you’re teaching it to prisoners, and they’re receiving it. these little things we just do. And it’s just our life. It’s just what we do. You know, it’s just what we do

Yeah.

It’s just what we do. Okay, we make great egg sandwiches. It’s just what we do and other people look at it and go. Wow! How did you get? How did you do all that? But they’ve got their own stuff that they’ve done just like you and I

Exactly exactly you know. I always tell people on stage. If you have a mess like I did. I really expect you to turn it into a message, because I had no idea my story about from childhood all the way up to now would impact so many lives. And I’m talking thousands and thousands and thousands. But the thing about it is, if we don’t believe in ourselves. We’re not going to feel that way.

Okay, so what? I want to give some advice. If you have a mess, you turn it into your message. You go out, you speak, you share. Get in networking groups. They need to hear your story, because you never know. You never, ever know how you’re going to change somebody’s life. and I’m very honored to say this. 

I had a woman come up to me after a speaking engagement and she said, You know, she says I’ll never forget this, she said. You know I wasn’t even coming today. My my friend wanted me to come, but I actually wanted to kill myself. Today.I said, so let me let me.let me ask you this question. You were contemplating suicide. She says. No, I was going to do it. She says, but something told me I need to go with my friend because I promised her I’d go.

And she says your story changed my life, and now I have hope. and that’s my. That was. That’s because I turned my mess into a message. I was courageous enough to step out of the boat and tell, and now I tell it all over the world, and just some days it’s this blows my mind, though you know it just blows my mind what God can do when we allow him to use us as his vessel

It’s really beautiful. And do you just smile? You know I’m my show collector and connector. Fascinating people is kind of this little cute Tagline that I came up with because I was trying to. Who am I? Well, my friend, I meet friends at Aldi right. I met friends at the grocery store. Yeah. I have, because I’ve chosen to stand in my light and let the light shine, and people are drawn to that. And whether it’s just a smile or eye contact, or I buy him a candy bar and offer a hug. That’s what that candy bar hugs book is about, you know.You know you can’t. It doesn’t take much. And sometimes you’re the own. You’re the one to make that impact in their lives. Right then and there. You have no idea.

And when you take the focus off of yourself, if you take the focus off of what’s wrong and put it on. What? How can I make a difference? And if people listening, you know, I we talk about this a lot. I do. Anyway, if you’re in depression, or if you’re in a low place, the dark place, gratitude. gratitude, it’s got to start with something that you’re thankful for, and something, and perhaps how you could encourage someone else. Those 2 things once

you can think of And I said this, I think it was on last week’s shows, like. you know, I’m thankful for my toenails. I mean, you know, if if it comes down to you can’t think of anything there, there’s always something.

Absolutely.

I’m sorry there’s that’s key

You’re right, and there’s so many times I get up, and my hair is either all messed up, or you know the cuts are not right, or you know I can’t get the style. And I say, Shut up, Terri, because you’re you should just be grateful that you have hair, because unfortunately, there’s a lot of women that get up in the morning, and they have to put wigs on because they’re dealing with cancer or something else going on, and I have a friend who’s a beautiful, beautiful woman.

And for a long time I did not know she was wearing a wig, but then she showed me her hair, which kind of shocked me when she took her wig off, but she lost all of her hair to Covid. and it’s growing back slowly. But it’s it’s

very short. Yeah, I was just. I was shocked. But you know what? It’s not on the out. Our beauty is not on the outside. It’s in the inside. Well.

Yes, this is a meat suit. It’s a skit. It’s this, you know, who we are has very little to do with this, if we, unless we allow it, because I’ve met no arms, no legs, Nick, or however you say his name, little

Oh, wow!

I have met him. I got pictures with him. I’ve hugged him. I’m a zig ziglar legacy, certified trainer, and he’s been a part of that. You know he tried to kill himself when he was little, because he wanted to drown himself, but he couldn’t, because he couldn’t. He could. He was. He couldn’t hold his breath underwater, you know. He was all long, and so he tells those kinds of stories to himself right? But he he’s who he is not this who he is is the God, soul, spirit inside

Right

And if I became, you know Heaven forbid! It’s disfigured, or whatever. It’s easier, I’m sure said, than done. But when I was flying, you know we there would be some cranky old people coming on. They’re just in pain and mean, and whatever. And then there would be someone just with the most beautiful countenance, not a beautiful face, not but a countenance of

Yeah.

Genuine kindness, and smiling and smiling eyes. And you could just feel that they, you know, all this messed up wheelchair stuff, whatever they got wasn’t them

Right.

Unless you let that define you. Right

Right. You know.

I’m glad that you said that because back to the mirror exercise that I do with my clients, because some, when they 1st get to know me, they’ll do the same thing in the 1st couple of sessions. They’ll come to me and I’ll go, Well, what was on the scale of one to 1010 being the best. Where do you see yourself loving yourself back in the mirror they go. Well, let’s see, I’ve had a good day today. Nobody’s bought, I said. That’s not what I’m asking. This is what I’m asking. I want you to look in the mirror and think about where you’ve been and where you’re going, and how you feel about yourself right now and then they’ll oh, well, I feel I feel like an 8. Okay? 

So then we’re making some progress. Because you know us women, we can look in the mirror and be our worst critic, you know. Oh, my gosh! Look at the gray hair, or look at the look at the the wrinkles on my face, the crow’s feet

We focus on what’s wrong. Instead of what’s right, we focus on that 10% of of you know, I’ve got a spot on my face, and I’ve got, you know, my gosh! Instead of

if I have a smile in my eyes and a smile on my lips.

Yes.

The rest is almost gonna be invisible. If you have a smile in your heart and a smile on your face.

It. It was so funny. I was on stage one day, and I asked everybody to pull out their driver’s license. and I said, I really want you to stare at this. I see you did the same thing, and you know, because so

They don’t take good pictures. They try

All, all I heard was, Oh, oh, no, I don’t want to, but I said, you know what I said. I want you to look at that person. I don’t want to look. I don’t want you to look at your face or your expression. I want you to look at that person’s soul. you know, and then you could just see some smiles coming. But I also told him this. You have every right when you go to the license branch that you can smile for your pictures and see. 

People don’t realize that they think they have to do a muck shot. The last time I told this lady, I said, don’t take a picture until I have a smile on my face, and I have the best. I have the best driver’s license picture I’ve ever had

That’s awesome. Well, it’s incredible how fast the time hour goes. And this is, we’re at the end, is there? TerriMorecoaching.com Terri with an I more coaching.com. What do you last word? Last word? What do you want to leave them with

I want to leave you with this, no matter what age you are or where you’ve been. you can always change, and by that I say, get the professional help that Charla and I offer to anyone that needs to remove those emotional triggers from their past. You heard my story. If I can do it. You can, too. Thank you. Thank you so much.

That’s amazing. So anybody who’s watching, I said, You know, when she got on, I’m like, Okay, we. We coordinated our colors here I like. you might know teal is my favorite color, because I can’t spell turquoise, but we didn’t plan it, but it was fun

It was fun. Yes, and thank you for allowing me to share my story. And I can’t wait for everyone to see the movie. It’s not. And I want to make sure I understand and make this clear. It’s not a full fledged movie. This is a, this is a narrative movie a short, it’s so it’s like a short movie

Almost a documentary thing. So guess what people are listening to. Twitter my little Twitter size books, right people are, you know, wanting shorter content, and it probably will be so incredibly impactful. Not probably it will be so incredibly impactful that you know, the rest of the story might get to come out later, too. Who knows but

There’s talk already about doing a Mini network. Netflix series

Wow! Well, and on your life. And who would have thought right? You think you grow up going here? I’ve been an abuse thing, and I was a I’m nothing

but God So everyone, thank you so much for joining us. We’ll see you next year. Subscribe on Youtube, watch the replays and see you next week, and 

Remember to always, always, always Choose Joy.

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For more insights and to follow Charla’s creative journey, check out her website and her other projects:

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About  Terri Moore

 From being a survivor of the dangerous world of street drug dealing, alcoholism, and a sexual assault attack to becoming a beacon of transformation, Terri Moore embodies the power of radical change. After surviving a marriage to a man who concealed his first-degree murder conviction by posing as a Marine, she has emerged as a force for healing and hope. As a certified professional women’s speaker and transformational coach, she has touched countless lives across 500+ churches and numerous stages nationwide. Her best-selling book, “Face to Face with God: My Best Friend,” chronicles her extraordinary journey through addiction, deception, abuse, and assault to becoming a powerful advocate for emotional healing.

As the founder and former executive director of a domestic violence and sexual assault organization, Terri brings profound firsthand understanding to her work. She specializes in helping individuals break free from emotional triggers that have held them back for decades. Her unique approach combines raw authenticity with practical strategies, empowering both women and men to transform from feeling like a “zero” to becoming a confident, resilient “ten.”

Drawing from her own triumph over life’s darkest moments, Terri doesn’t just inspire change—she embodies it. Her message resonates with audiences because it comes from a place of hard-won wisdom and genuine compassion. When Terri is telling how she turned her mess into a now Worldwide message, you can’t hear a pin drop in the audience because she has everyone on the edge of their seat as her story unfolds.

Terri has been featured on CBS, ABC, NBC, FOX and many local TV and radio stations. She has been a guest speaker on podcasts around the world. Terri has been featured on front pages of Women’s Day, and Faith, Family, Filled magazine.

Terri feels her biggest accomplishment as a professional speaker is when she had the privilege of being on stage with her favorite Christian Artist, Casting Crowns where she spoke to 8000 people sharing the message of hope and healing in an abused world.

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a retired award-winning flight attendant, Olympic Torch bearer, personal development junkie, Inspired Speaker, Published Author and Your Courageous Coach, I want to share my passion of living life full-out, saying YES to intriguing opportunities, and encouraging YOU to do the same. Let’s jump on a discovery call and get to know each other. Find all things Charla at CharlaAnderson.com/links.

On The Charla Anderson Show, We discuss Mindset, How much Your WORDS matter, Princess to Queen energy, mantras, HOPE, Faith, Miracles, Overcoming, and much, much more, including learning from amazing guests.

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